LIVING STONES

I feel like this right now....

2012-01-21T06:14:00.000-08:00

except I'm not standing on the ball, but laying prostrate on the floor with the spilled milk in my hair, desperately trying to save the fish, and if it's my house, the dog is peeing in the corner. And my family is just milling around as if nothing is amiss. Why? Because I've been this way for so long that it's my normal.

Except it's really getting to me now, and I'm becoming increasingly discontent in my imbalance. I can't get it together and it's really driving me just a little bit mad. At school, my place where I am always organized and together, I'm drowning. My desk is a pile of unfiled paperwork, unwritten curriculum maps and lesson plans, ungraded reading units. At home, where I am never organized, it is beyond the point I consider "no return." Laundry baskets full of clothes--washed and unwashed. Baskets full of random toys. Unfinished homework, unmatched socks, entire rooms devoted to piles of things that we haven't put away and needed somewhere to stash. Weight loss? Stalled. Taking time to exercise means having a free afternoon without a dr. appointment, parent meeting, practice. Eating right means making the time and finding the money to buy the right things and denying myself the quick fix for the hunger of my stomach and my soul.

I don't really know the solution. I think women who have it all together must never sleep, never relax, never get lost in a book, never sit down to snuggle with their little ones or listen to a Barbie show, never blog or facebook. And when do they find time for their husbands?

I'm trying this weekend, as I do every weekend, to regain some of that balance. We've a rare weekend where we have nowhere to go and nothing to do except stay at home, go to church and to Nanny's for lunch. I have great plans to get the laundry done and put away, Hannah's homework that we forgot to do this week done, school work completed (I brought home two big bags of it.ugh) Spent a nice evening with the family last night eating what I wanted, vegging on the couch with my babies and big kids watching a good movie (Courageous), ignoring everything but the most important things--my family and my faith. Today it's time to try to get up off the floor, wipee (for those not mothers, it's when you clean yourself or your child up using a wipee because you are too busy/lazy/or not at home) the milk out of my hair, and climb back on my ball.

Happy Weekend, and Happy Balancing to you all!

Happy Birthday, Maddy!

2012-01-20T16:04:00.000-08:00

My beautiful third born, my second daughter, Madeline celebrated her 15th birthday on January 15th. We were fortunate to be off from school on her birthday, as it was MLK Jr.'s birthday. We went to church that morning as a family, and then upon Maddy's request, we headed to the lake to visit Grandma and Grandpa.

Waking up 15 years old!

As soon as we got to the lake, we opened presents. One of her favorite presents was inspired by her latest obsession, Hunger Games.

Her main gift, a new laptop. She had saved some of the money, and for her birthday, we kicked in the rest.

Hannah and Daryl watching Maddy open all of her presents

the big kids

and Charlotte, who chose to play instead!

Practicing inside....(she didn't let the arrow go inside!)

and outside

Then we went ice skating. Ice skating in Georgia? Yep. The Ritz Carlton made an ice skating rink for a few months, so we went and checked it out.

Hard to believe that I used to be an ice skater. OK, I was 5, but I still used to be able to make it around an ice skating rink without having to be led around the rink like an old lady!

You can't tell from this picture, but I did eventually get the hang of it!

After a dinner of Grandpa's famous hamburgers, we had cake and ice cream.

and then skyped with Kathleen and "baby cousins"

Happy Birthday Maddy Moo! We love you!

2012-01-09T16:44:00.000-08:00

I'm in a funk. A blogging funk. A teaching funk. A cleaning funk. A dieting funk. I just don't want to do any of it, which is really disconcerting to me, because pre-January, I loved to write, loved my job, was determined and eager to have a clean and organized house, and was relishing (no pun intended) eating healthy and working out.

And now? I'd really like to veg out on the couch with a box of Mike and Ike's and some nacho chips, watching reality television and surfing the net. All day. Every day. Only taking a break to climb into bed and sleep.

I know a lot of it has to do with being tired and not sleeping. When I work, I sleep. When I was on vacation for two weeks? I went to bed late, woke up several times a night, and awoke most days at 4:30 for good.

I know some of it has to do with my struggle with my weight. I need to have this permanently tattooed on my psyche:

image courtesy of Pinterest

Oh, how I wish that I was one of those people--like most normal people, I suppose--that say to themselves, "I need to lose a few pounds. I'll just eat less and exercise more. And once in a while, if I slip up and want a cookie, I'll eat a cookie." Oh no. It's this huge twisted mind game for me. ( I wrote a blog post about it last night, and then decided that it was just all too transparent, even for me, and I deleted it.)

And I know that part of it is not enough time with my husband, not enough time with my kids, not enough time to do anything well. And who knows....the post Christmas blahs? The winter blues?

It makes no sense at all to me. I have more to be thankful for than just about anyone I know. I love and am loved. I have everything I need, and most of what I want. I have a faithful, honest husband, a nice home, healthy happy children, a good job. A God who loves me beyond my comprehension.

I'm hoping to snap out of this soon--more time in the Word, a little more self forgiveness, and perhaps, if I'm lucky, a little more sleep!

Sarah's Sweet Seventeen

2012-01-03T18:32:00.000-08:00

See this little girl in the tutu?

She turned 17...yes seventeen on Saturday.

It was a laid back day full of family togetherness. Then, at dinnertime, before Josh headed out for his New Year's Eve festivities, we enjoyed Pizza Hut...her choice.

Then it was time for "Cake! Cake! Cake!" And yes, they really were jumping for joy over the prospect of cake!

And wouldn't you be jumping for joy over this chocolatey goodness?

Sisters, waiting patiently....

What could be better than being serenaded by your daddy?

"Helping" Sarah blow out the candles...

Yummmmm,.....cake!

The little girls had a hard time NOT being the ones to open the presents, so Sarah graciously let them help....excuse me. She let them open them, and Charlotte opened them all.

Sarah's present from us--a new bed! Daryl was really on the ball with the bed making this break. He made this queen size farm bed--so pretty, too--in about three days. We shopped for her new linens a few days before her birthday. It wasn't a huge surprise, and there wasn't a whole lot for her to open, but she said it was totally worth it!

Christmas 2011

2011-12-30T09:17:00.000-08:00

Christmas this year was great...and I got a new laptop! (Thank you to the best husband EVER!)

Warning......Picture Overload!

(and I have NO idea why halfway through the pictures got huge!)

Sarah and I baked...

and these were so cute that no one ate them!

Our tree...and this is Christmas scaled down. We started about eight years ago getting only three presents per child to concentrate on the real meaning of Christmas and cut down on the commercialism. Then the kids started buying each other gifts, and well...this is what scaled down Christmas for seven people looks like!

Daryl had time off from school, from the college, and from electrical, and he finally finished Hannah's bed. Charlotte enjoyed it! (the other picture of Hannah with her bed is on the other computer....will work on getting that!)

Sweet baby face with long baby hair

my baby doing very un-babyish things!

and sporting new big girl hair!

A Christmas Eve game of Jenga

and lunch at Sonny's with all the Stones

We came home to open presents with Maranda

Despite the face....she loved the coloring book!

Inspired by "A Christmas Story" and in need of a new Christmas tradition, we went for Chinese. This is what I got when I asked the girls to smile!

The elves came while we were out to eat!

cookies for Santa

Christmas morning!

The big kids got phones, so this is what I got from them!

I will be back tomorrow for an end of the year post!

It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas....Kindergarten Christmas!

2011-12-19T10:13:00.000-08:00

Christmas in the elementary school....there's nothing like it. The kids are excited, Christmas music fills the air, everyone's fingers are sticky from the myriad of Christmas crafts. The kids are excited, the teachers are tired, and both can't wait until the last day before break!

This week also meant, for us, lots of activities for Hannah in kindergarten.

First up was the kindergarten and preschool Christmas program, "Love Came Down."

Here's Hannah in my room before the program.

Coppin' a "tude"

on the risers before the program. During the program, I was too smitten with the cuteness of my daughter and the pure sweetness of 3-5 year olds singing about baby Jesus that I forgot to take pictures.

With Grandma and Grandpa after the program

With Daddy and Nanny

And with Maddy. She didn't have an exam, so she got to come too!

Later in the week, it was time to party!!!

Here is Hannah and her friend Jacob in the super cute sweatshirts that they made!

The impromptu Christmas concert started by none other than my daughter!

Jesus Bingo. Oh, goodness.

Hannah, after she didn't win the first game.

or the second...

or the last...

It's so hard to lose when you're five!

Then there was the book swap.

Waiting....

so excited!!!!

Reason #123 why I don't teach kindergarten.

Notice the boys rolling around on the floor amidst all of the chaos!

Merry Christmas from Mrs. Farr's Kindergarten class!

It's beginning to look alot like Christmas....Aloha Christmas!

2011-12-19T09:55:00.000-08:00

The title of today's blog post makes one think that perhaps we are celebrating Christmas in Hawaii this year, but alas, we are home and enjoying every minute of this busy busy busy holiday season!

Aloha Christmas was the title of our church's Christmas play this year.

The girls that Sunday morning, which has nothing to do with the program, but I love it when I get a picture of them all together, and I think they look so pretty! (and for some reason, I think Maddy looks like Kim Kardashian in this picture!)

Hannah had to be at the church 3 hours early to go over the play and get ready, and for the first time, I left her there by herself. She was fine with it...I couldn't wait to get back to church for her, just sure that she needed me, wanted me, was falling apart without me.

Um...don't think so...do you?

This is how she greeted us. "I'm surfing!"

So happy big brother is home and here to see them!

(Char looks thrilled, doesn't she?)

Hannah really got in to all the dancing!

Midway through the play, they all left....and she came back as a cow!

And to my surprise, Maddy came back in with the rest of the cast. Seems as if she asked if they needed help, and they put her in!

Christmas rocks!

After the program, Grandma and Grandpa met us at 15th Street Pizza for dinner (and to see Josh, who was working that night)

Hannah and Charlotte enjoyed the tree...

maybe a little too much!

mmmmm....ketchup!

Let Christmas Begin!

2011-12-05T19:42:00.000-08:00

Since Josh was home from college for the long weekend, we thought we would get a head start on our Christmas decorating and go ahead and put our tree up. This is a first for our family. Usually, we hem and haw and procrastinate until we find a short window one weekend night to put it up, and for the first week or two after Thanksgiving, I am remorseful over our lack of holiday spirit. I think, though, that because Josh isn't home regularly, Daryl decided to take advantage of the time he is home. That, in itself, is a gift.

181. Putting up the tree the weekend after Thanksgiving.

182. The Christmas tree smell

183. Watching my boys work together to get the tree up.

The stockings were hung by the chimney with care....

Which one of these is not like the others?
(excuse my mix of Sesame Street with Twas the Night before Christmas...)

ah yes,...the stockings. Josh's was completed a good month or two before he was born. Sarah's was completed by the Christmas before she was born (New Year's Eve) Maddy's? In time for her first Christmas. Hannah's was done just in time for her...um....5th Christmas. And Charlotte's? Well, let's just say that hers is a work in progress!

Charlotte loved going through all the ornaments

Each one of them has a special meaning, and Daryl told her all about it. So sweet.

The big kids worked together to put up the lights.

Maddy and her ornament from Grandma from last year.

FAST FORWARD A WEEK....

Breakfast with Santa

Here, you see Santa....

and here are my girls eating breakfast....NOT with Santa.

Because they were scared. No really. Scared. Like, scream hysterically and hide behind my legs while chanting "carry you, carry you, mommy" scared

However, I was the official photographer for the event (I know, I'm laughing at that one too!) so they had to come out of the nursery. Hannah soon warmed up to Santa once she realized that it was really just Mr. Bernie.

Charlotte, perhaps worn down by her two solid hours of crying and clinging, finally decides to take a look....of course, after I have changed her out of her new dress from Kay Kay

And this is what we got. Probably would have been a better picture, but I had packed up the camera after the last of the children left. But it's something.....right?

Next on the holiday list?

Spivey and the church play...

Stay tuned for more pictures!

Thanksgiving 2011

2011-12-05T19:18:00.000-08:00

WARNING: Picture Overload!

I love Thanksgiving. A week off from school. A week to celebrate being thankful for what you have. Being with family. And most of all, the beginning of the Christmas season! The first specials come on TV. Christmas music on the radio. Putting up the Christmas tree. Just enough Christmas to enjoy before all of the stress and hustle and bustle begins. You're just at the beginning, with a feeling of anticipation, not worn down by the endless stream of parties/programs/concerts/projects.

Ah...another gift. 166. Thanksgiving

We all slept in Thanksgiving day (til 8:00 for me!) and then packed up in the SUV and headed for Grandma's house.

My brother, sister, and her kids were already there. We couldn't wait to see everyone, especially Clare and Cole, my sister's twins. The last time we had seen them had been in the summer. We were supposed to go to their first birthday party in August, but for a fateful encounter with an elliptical machine.

When we got there, they had just woken up from a nap, and I think the sheer enormity of our clan overwhelmed them a bit.

A little food in the belly, and they were all smiles...

The guys, hanging out "together" while the women did the cookin and watchin the kids thing...

Time to eat!

(look how skinny my sister is...so jealous! And she just had twins a year ago!)

I volunteered Daryl and myself to sit at the kids' table. I remembered how mad Kathleen used to get when she was included with the kids, just because she was the youngest of the older people, so I didn't want to make Maddy or Sarah do it.

Sisters....

Char had three bites of mashed potatoes and a roll and decided she was ready for some rappin'.

Before we left, we wanted to try to get a picture of all of the cousins...

(note my children all sitting and smiling nicely....)

My brother, my sister, and me.

So many gifts that day....

167. My sister as a mommy. She is 11 years younger than I am, so she is always about 15 in my head (which makes me about 26...I like it!) She is so good with those babies....so disciplined and laid back and always on a schedule. Sniff sniff....I think she's all grown up on me!

168. Clare

169. Cole

170. Watching how my sister and her husband work together as a team so well, so easily, so naturally. Makes me happy to see her in a happy marriage.

171. Seeing my brother. It's been a while. Shamefully, we both live in the smae metropolitan area. He's way north of Atlanta, and I'm south. We never see each other, which is sad to me. It was good to see him too!

172. Mom's good china.

173. Setting the table with my mom.

174. Making our water glasses "sing"

175. laughing about old times

176. enjoying Thanksgiving without it being all about food--I stayed within my point range and even managed to lose 2.2 pounds that week (then fell apart last week, but that's a story for a different post)

178. All of us together in the same car at the same time

179. Daryl, at home, with us, all day

180. Christmas music!

2011-11-23T17:53:00.000-08:00

In honor of Thanksgiving tomorrow, and inspired by a blog I read, I present

The ABC's of Thanksgiving

All of my family, home, at one time.

Bubble Guppies and Barbie movies.

Though I could recite entire episodes by heart, they are great go-to's when I want/need to get something done!

Charlotte.

My sweet sweet Charlotte. Absolutely the easiest baby/child ever! She is starting to talk so much more and I fall in love each and every day!

Daryl.
I do not even have the words to say how thankful I am that God sent him to me. How blessed am I to be married to my best friend, the hardest working man I know, an amazing father, and someone who makes me laugh every single day?

Eagles Landing Christian Academy

Nine years ago, Daryl and I decided to put our children in Christian education. What an amazing decision that turned out to be. Not only is it a great place to work, but the teachers and administration have been instrumental in helping our children grow in the Lord. It's not perfect, but the teachers and staff love and care for the children and do everything in their power to come along beside us in educating our children.

First graders. I love my job!

God's Love

Hannah.

My miracle baby, who I thought would never talk. Now she never stops...ever. She is joyful and loving and sweet and spirited. She loves her family, friends, and Jesus with her whole heart and without hesitation. Love her, love her, love her!

Island...

St. George Island, FL

Our favorite vacation spot. When I go to my "happy place," I find myself there.

Josh.

My man child. So grown up, and already a man...but still my baby boy. My first born. I am so proud of the man he has become. He also makes me laugh!!!

Ketchup.

Put it on anything and Hannah will eat it!

Laughing

with my family around the dinner table.

Madeline.

Or Maddy, as she prefers. She has been my spitfire since the day she was born and not a day goes by that she doesn't challenge and inspire me with her passion and strong will. I can't wait to see what she is going to do with her life!

Noni and Ed.

Wonderful, supportive parents and doting grandparents. So blessed to have both of them still in my life!

Old, comfy sweat pants

Patience

of my husband

Quiet

mornings before everyone gets up.

Running.

I took up running this year and I love it.

Sarah.

Sweet, sensitive Sarah. She is my nurturer. I love the way she loves her sisters. I love the way that she has grown and matured over the years. I love that she is not ony my daughter, but my friend.

Time.

I love having this week off and having time to clean and read and be with my family.

Unconditional love from my children and Jesus.

Voices.

My daughters have the sweetest singing voices, and I love to hear them singing. Day and night. In the car and at home. Someone is always singing.

Weight Watchers.

95.6 pounds are gone because of this program. It's the only way I can do it!

eXcellent parapro.

I have had the good luck and privelege of working with my para for nine years now. I don't even have to tell her what needs to be done. She just knows.

Yackity, yack, yack.

I've mentioned before that Hannah never stops talking. I am thankful for this, because I get such a glimpse into her heart and mind. And I know that soon enough, the words won't come as often or as numerous!

Zebra striped flats. Enough said.

Thanksgiving Break full of gifts...

2011-11-22T16:44:00.000-08:00

153. a CLEAN house! I made a list for eah day, Sat-Tues, and I am sitting here now in a clean from top to bottom house with NO laundry to be done. I LOVE IT!

154. Christmas cookies

Sarah's rendition of our family, in sugar cookie

155. little girls with frosting on their faces....

because they did this!

156. the way Hannah has grown to take pride in her work (and I know she needs a haircut, but she insists that she will keep it out of her eyes)

157. Christmas smelling candles

158. getting out the Christmas books

159. seeing Josh pull into the driveway

160. that first hug

161. holding hands around the dinner table and saying the blessing

162. having too many people in the living room to sit comfortably--I'll take a smushy hour of television watching if I'm being smushed by those I love!

163. my swiffer wet jet....oh how I love it!

164. thrift shopping with Sarah

165. the sound of rain in the chimney

so much to be thankful for!

2011-11-16T07:16:00.000-08:00

Cue the music...."It's the most hectic time of the year...." Wait...that's not how it goes...but man, that's how it feels. It's still pre-Thanksgiving and we've had cheer competition, play practice, Thanksgiving programs, and more. Add to it a husband (a very very dear husband, I might add) who is working so hard we rarely see him, and sick children, and it makes for a very busy, very tired, often discouraged momma. So I'll admit it. I've not counted blessings as I should have. I might even own up to wallowing once or twice, or more. My laptop, with the list on it, died, taking the list with it, so I haven't recorded any this week, but looking back on this week in pictures, I remember. :)

138. My husband's work ethic. He is the hardest worker I know, and though sometimes I tell him he works too hard, I am grateful that he does. I know it seems like a thankless job sometimes (most of the time, really), as it seems that with five children, the needs are never ending and we always need something, but he does it without complaining or grumbling.

139. I am the grumbler of the family and he puts up with me.

140. Being able to have him home in the evenings, in his favorite spot on earth--his recliner.

141. Listening to Christmas carols on the radio on my drive to Columbus last weekend.

142. A two hour drive by myself, with opportunities to think and sing and breathe.

143. The excitement in my girls' voices when they called to tell me they placed at sectionals and qualified for State Cheerleading Competition.

144. The girls on their team. They, for the most part, are a cohesive, Christ loving group of girls who minister to each other. They represented our school and God at the competition and I couldn't have been prouder.

145. The fact that Sarah and Maddy can put aside their "sisterness" and compete on the same team peacefully. There has been a dispute or two, but they have kept it off the floor and at home. So proud of them...especially Maddy, who has a hard time holding her tongue!

146. Second chances. Maddy's drama teacher decided last minute to hold a performance of Pocahontas for Thanksgiving. I couldn't go last time, so I didn't see the whole thing. So glad I got to see it all.
147. Hearing Hannah's kindergarten friends calling her name, and seeing her joy at seeing them when we got to the school.
148. Watching her hug all her friends. She is definitely a hugger!
149. Hannah's sweet friend, Gracie, and her even sweeter mom, Bridgett. They invited Hannah to sit with them so I could deal with this cutie. She did well, I thought, until about ten minutes into the show when she decided to repeatedly kick the seats in front of us. As I was taking her to the back, I heard a "Thank you, Jesus!"

150. Being able to take a sick day to stay home with a feverish Charlotte.
151. A babysitter who cares enough to call to make sure I have donuts at home because "they are her favorite!"
152. Charlotte can put on her shoes all by herself! (her shoe choice today? One sparkly light up flip flop and one twinkle toes!)

Off to grab a snuggle with my sickie!

Gift #137

2011-11-09T18:22:00.000-08:00

137. Watching my dear, sweet husband share the gospel with a child. I had the great honor and privelege of watching (while working with my own AWANA girls) Daryl as he worked with one of our littlest, and probably most needy boys tonight. Oh, how I love the way he loves the Lord, loves children, and loves to share the Word. How blessed am I?

Sunday Fun

2011-11-08T17:34:00.000-08:00

Last weekend was a busy one. Saturday and Sunday were jam packed with fun and family. I left my camera at home on Saturday, but I remembered to break it out on Sunday.

A sweet Charlotte in her jammies before church

Us...all gussied up for my neice Angela's wedding. I don't know why we didn't think of this sooner, but we actually have a tripod, and we tried to take a family picture. We took about 6 pictures, with Daryl setting the timer while we posed and then he had to run to get in place. Then we all would run to see what it looked like and decide to delete it and try again. This one was the best of the bunch. I look like an amazon woman, but overall, I think it's a good picture and no one hated it.

At the wedding...waiting for the food

Maddy and her cousin, Katie. I am so thankful for their sweet friendship.

Sweet, pretty Sarah

Char and her new "ba." Sunday morning during Sunday school, Charlotte dropped her bottle and it broke in half. We took it as a sign from above, and finally got rid of the beloved "ba." She watched as we threw it away and then took the nipple, put it in her mouth, and was totally content.

A very blurry, far away picture of the beautiful bride and equally beautiful groom. I wish I would have gotten a better picture. She was so beautiful, is so beautiful, inside and out.

We had to leave before the party got into full swing so that the little girls (and us older folks too) could get to bed. Before we left, though, the girls had fun with the photo booth

More gifts...
127. the beautiful ceremony on Sunday--full of love, full of beauty, full of Christ

128. a hard eucharisto--a innocent comment from a friend that made me realize a bad decision, and that I need to focus a little more on making time for each of my children individually

129. shopping with my mom

130. size 14 pants

131. "thank you for praying for me mom."

132. being able to share girly things with my growing girls

133. a diet coke first thing in the morning

134. the easy transition away from the "ba."

135. "I wanna big girl cup, mama."

136. Thanksgiving crafts

More Gifts

2011-11-04T16:56:00.000-07:00

101. The Robitussin spilled on my laptop, rendering it useless, unless typing only vowels. For the full story, look a few posts down. Anyways...even though I ruined an expensive piece of technology, it has freed up my time and I've been more productive.

102. A day at home alone

103. "Hide and Teek" with Charlotte--which is really just hiding under the blanket with her

104. Watching Char in the tub, listening to her tell me "I wash my back, I wash my hair," etc.

105. "I your girl Daddy."

106. Watching how proud Hannah was of her little sister when we went on the field trip

107. the smell of a fire in the fireplace

108. little girls in footie pajamas

109. a sweet e-mail from my neice

110. Hannah's improved handwriting

111. Seeing my family after spending the day alone

112. A compliment from a stranger at Wendy's, about how well behaved my girls are

113.  matching and folding 57 pairs of socks

114. Breakfast with my Maddy

115.   80's weekend on the radio

116. "Mommy, I just love you too much!"

117. Being able to move a child up in reading groups

118. empty (for avery short while) laundry baskets

119. reading Sarah's Jamaica letters

120.  realizing that God provided exactly what we needed in October, when we weren't sure how we were going to make it

121. Pay day!

122. Clean(er) carpets

123.  Listening to Daryl tell the Sunday school class about his "gifts" this week. Being one of his "gifts"

124. Get Well cards from my first graders

125.  Five hours of uniterrupted sleep

126. Watching how God uses my experiences and hardships so that I can help others

Halloween 2011

2011-11-04T16:44:00.000-07:00

Pumpkin carving time! It's hard for me to fathom, but until he met us, Daryl had never carved a pumpkin before. And now look at him....he's a pro!

Sarah and Maddy carved their very own pumpkins this year.

Hannah and Maddy's pumpkins. Sarah carved a light bulb into hers, but I forgot to take a picture of it. (Sorry Sarah!)

Doesn't our pumpkin look scary from this angle?

Yeah, that was just a trick to hide the fact that we really made a lopsided, sorta goofy looking pumpkin.

Our little fairy and pumpkin. Hannah asked me, "Why do I have to be a fairy again?" Well, Hannah. Because mommy is a procrastinator and really dislikes costume shopping and you really didn't seem to care, so I got the least trashy looking costume they had at Walmart. Because really? Fishnet stockings for a costume in size 4-6? OK, I didn't say that. But that's what I was thinking. What I really said was, "Because you make such a cute fairy!"

We went down the street to Daniel Park for what was touted as a "safe" Halloween. Translation: games and inflatables with long lines. Plus a little bit of candy.

Still, we went since no one trick or treats in our neighborhood anymore.

We stood in line for one game. For a long time. And never got to the front.

We found a line that was just candy and that was the only time they truly trick or treated (if you can really call it that)

Then they decided that they would rather do this.

After a while, we headed to Nanny's house, where Nanny ooohed and aaahhhed over them, and then emptied her entire candy bowl into their sacks.

Another Halloween in the books-onto my favorite time of the year!

Pumpkin Patch 2011

2011-11-04T16:19:00.000-07:00

Last week, I caught a cold from one of my kiddos at work. I coughed so much that I was keeping my husband awake at night, so in a gesture of good will, I slept in Josh's room one night. Armed with my Kleenex, nose spray, Robitussin, and of course, my laptop (so I would have something to do while I stayed awake coughing), I headed to bed. At 2 am, I awoke, needing more cough syrup. In a stroke of pure genius(note the sarcasm) I used the light of my laptop to see to pour the cough syrup into that little bitty cup. I'd be able to stay in bed, not turn the light on, go right back to sleep.

In retrospect, that was probably not such a good idea. For at 2 am, it appears, I lose all ability to pour sticky cough syrup into said little bitty cup. And now?

No laptop. OK...that's not necessarily true. I still have a laptop. It just only types vowels. Which is a big improvement over the = sign. So...instead of sitting on the couch in the evenings blogging, facebooking, and surfing the net, I wait until everyone else is done with a computer. So what you get is a whole bunch of blog posts in one day!

Anyways....

Josh came home for the weekend so we could make our annual trek to the pumpkin patch. How I love that boy. How good it was to have him home, and I got my pictures!

I got to be a mom today....

2011-10-27T16:54:00.000-07:00

instead of a teacher! I got to go on a field trip with Hannah's kindergarten class today, and I decided to take Charlotte with us. I felt as if I had drug them with us as we went to competitions, play practices, cheer practices, Spivey...that we deserved some time together. So after I dropped the girls off, got my classroom ready, and dropped Hannah off in her classroom, Char and I went to the car to wait to follow the bus.

Here's Char-"I not in my seat!"-lotte playing "hide and teek" under the blanket in the back seat.

We got there and found Hannah in line with her best friend, Gracie.

Charlotte in the stroller, in which she stayed in for about 2.5 minutes

Soooooo excited to see the farm!

The first stop was to learn about how cotton is grown. "Where are the cows?"

This brought back memories. When we were moving from Wisconsin to Alabama, my mom made my dad jump a fence to get some cotton to show us. Also made him stop and get some peat moss!

Finally....time to pick our pumpkins!

They had five minutes to pick a pumpkin. Hannah took the entire time to choose just the right pumpkin. Charlotte picked about 13 pumpkins in five minutes and wanted to keep them all!

Next it was hayride time...

and time to handfeed the cows!

Love this picture!

What would a trip to the farm be without the giant inflatable jumping mattress?

or the cow train?

Our trip ended with ice cream and pig races, but I didn't get pictures. The girls and I spent the rest of the day together. Just what I needed!

One of many gifts this weekend...

93. Finding Hannah, who had dressed herself and asked her father to do her hair, "reading."

94. Being able to be "Mommy" today instead of "Mrs. Stone."
95. Watching Hannah with her friends when she didn't know I was watching.
96. Soft cow ears.
97. Getting a compmliment from a stranger about how well behaved my girls are.
98. Tortilla chips.
99. Snuggles from a sleepy Charlotte.
100. That my husband didn't suffocate me with the pillow last night. I have a nasty cold and while I am getting better--and getting my voice back (try whispering all day to a classroom of first graders....fun stuff), as soon as I lay down, I start coughing. I slept from 5:34-6:24 this morning. Tonight at dinner he said, "Tonight, I will kill you." He kids....I hope! :)

A Visit to Toccoa Falls...full of gifts

2011-10-23T16:16:00.000-07:00

Saturday after Daryl got finished working, we loaded up the car and went to Toccoa Falls to visit Josh at "college." We had a great time, loved being with him, and now Hannah thinks that college means hiking through the woods an waterfalls. It always blesses my heart when we can be all together, even if it is only for a short time.

82. How the little girls just love their "Joshy."

83. Goofy pictures, even if they are a little blurry

I forgot to pack the stroller, and Charlotte pretty quickly got tired of walking, so Josh and Daryl took turns carrying her. She wasn't too fond of riding on Daryl's shoulders, but I am so thankful that Josh and Daryl were strong enough to carry her while we walked around the campus and hiked up to the little falls.

She did want to walk for maybe about 2 minutes.

We finally got to the top.

84. God's beautiful creation--litte Toccoa Falls.

85. The way Josh watches out for his little sisters.

He made sure that Hannah didn't get too far ahead, that Charlotte had a hand at all times and stayed off the slippery rocks, and that both girls got safely up and down from the rocks.

86. All my children together, happy and healthy.

After a while at the Little Falls, we climbed up the rocks to go to another little waterfall. It was so sweet to see how the big kids helped Hannah (and me) across the slippery rocks.

Other gifts from this weekend....

87. Pigtails

88. Josh and Maranda celebrating 3 years together. What a blessing it is to see how gentle, sweet, respectful, and thoughtful he is with her.

89. An answered prayer, when a young couple came to Sunday School this morning. He didn't stay, and they both didn't come to church, but I had been praying that they would come.

90. Lunch at Nanny's

91. Visiting with Darlene and Angela at Nanny's, and talking about her upcoming wedding

92. Leftovers for dinner...I didn't have to cook!

Too old? Or too blessed?

2011-10-22T06:00:00.000-07:00

Last night, I was having an internal meltdown. My family would say it was not so internal, but I digress. I came home after the longest week ever to a dirty kitchen, at least 10 loads of laundry that needed to be done, unmade beds, floors that needed to be swept and mopped, a playroom and a little girl bedroom that you couldn't even walk through, and dogs. Dogs that stay outside all day long....for sometimes 12 hours a day...and yet insist on emptying their bowels and bladders on our floors. With a weekend jam packed from dawn to dusk both days, I didn't know how I was going to get it all done. So I leapt into action, fixing dinner, throwing the first load of laundry in the washing machine, instructing the big girls to spiff and vacuum. And while I worked I thought about my Facebook status would be: "I am overwhelmed by my weekend."

Later, after I had folded two loads of laundry and was waiting for the next load to dry, I was trying to pick through clean clothes, clothes in suitcases (Hannah had played vacation a few nights ago), and the entire contents of both girls' dressers on the floor of their bedroom. I sat down on the couch to try to relax for a few minutes when it started. It started out low and it started to grow. (name that book.) The pounding. On walls, on furniture, on the floor. Two little girls, dressed in "princess" dresses and my jewelry, hitting everything they could find with plastic hammers. And again, I thought of my Facebook status: "I have decided I am too old to have small children, especially those that regularly empty out drawers and laundry baskets, borrow and then break/lose my jewelry, and insist on hitting anything and everything with plastic hammers."

Neither of those became my status, for I quickly declared bedtime and as soon as they were in bed, I retreated to my own messy bedroom and escaped into my book. This morning, the mess, the laundry, the active, imaginative, LOUD, little girls remain. But I no longer feel too old. OK. I do. Let me rephrase that. I no longer feel only too old. I also feel blessed. For how many of my friends are lucky enough to have little children at our age? How many of my friends long to have even one child, realizing that their window of time is quickly closing, and would love to have the chaos that reigns in my house? How many of my angel mommy friends would love to hear their child, who has gone on to be with Jesus, would kill to hear the footsteps and hammering and yammering of a young child?

I am not too old. I am overworked, overstressed, overwhelmed. I live in chaos, mess, noise. I live in house that daily reminds me that I am not organized or disciplined enough to conquer it, that reminds me daily of my housewifely shortcomings. I will never have enough time, energy, or skill to achieve perfection or even a consistently clean/orderly home. But I am not too old.

I am too blessed. So without further ado, .....

81. Little girls who run around hitting things with plastic hammers, empty drawers and laundry baskets of all their clothes, and try on my jewelry to play “princess” and then break or lose it.

I am indeed too blessed. Happy Saturday, everyone!

Hump Day,...at last

2011-10-19T18:35:00.000-07:00

What a week. Such a week that it doesn't even warrant an exclamation point. I love love love my job, but the kids have been squirrely, and I've struggled all week with food. And even though my pants are literally falling off (in the Chick Fil A parking lot), I feel myself losing control and sliding back in to old habits. I'm being kind to myself, not beating myself up, and starting each day anew, still running and exercising, hoping that my resolve returns. If not by Saturday, then like it or not, it's back on the wagon. Back on the scale to face the music.

Until then...more gifts...

65. Singing “All in All” in church

66. Daryl’s arm around me

67. Holding a new baby

68. Hearing Daryl talk about when we found out we were pregnant with Hannah after years of waiting and wanting and praying

69. The case of diet coke we ordered being delivered

70. Sarah talking to me of her plans for the future, after “praying about it for a few months,” and “hearing God speaking” to her

71. Girls who like hats

72. My wonderful baby sitter, who bought Charlotte these shoes, after she said, “I want those Kay Kay.”

These are Twinkle Toes. Cute as can be--and they light up--and she loves them. As well she should--they cost $45. I don't spend $45 on shoes. Kay Kay spoils Charlotte terribly. Buys her clothes, doesn't make her go to bed if she says "no." Does everything all day that she wants to. How she loves my child....She whispered to Charlotte as she was leaving today in her new shoes and new jacket, "Your mommy and daddy will never know how much I love you." Truly blessed we are to have found her.

73. The smell of the heater being turned on for the first time

74. Chick Fil A dinner with my girls

75. Watching Maddy be an Indian in the school’s production of “Pocahontas.”

76. Sweaters

77. Girls in winter jammies

78. Starting each weekday in prayer with my coworkers

79. Sarah’s art displayed at school

80. “The Middle”

I am sooooo Frankie Heck....complete with fast food eating family and whispering child. Watching this show makes me feel normal!

Sweet Saturday...and more gifts

2011-10-15T17:04:00.000-07:00

49. Shaved ice

50. Hand me downs

51. Finding a bin full of Hannah’s old clothes

52. Free books

53. A friend, who has struggled with miscarriages, infertility, and failed adoptions finally becoming a mommy

54. Reading my favorite childhood book to Hannah’s class

(If you've ever read this book, my room was really like Jennifer's--a total mess. I've since grown out of my slovenly ways, but my house screams otherwise!)
55. A full calendar-although I don’t often see it as a gift, it truly is a gift to be so blessed

56. “Mommy, look what I can spell!”

57. Watching my girls cheer

58. Writing samples in my first grade class, and an opportunity to see the growth

59. Having one of my students tell the class he wants to be a missionary when he grows up

60. My baby girl loving to color (Hannah always hated to color, and as a result, has difficulty with handwriting and neatness...this gives me hope for Char!)

61. “Ha-yay-yoo-lah” from the back seat

62. A message about discerning God’s will at a faculty meeting—just when I needed it

63. Dare I say it? Georgia football with my loves!

64. “Mom, look at this cool trick I can do with my eyes shut!”

(and no, it wasn't getting dressed in the dark. The outfit was on purpose. She was "looking like a cheerleader!")

More Gifts

2011-10-11T17:33:00.000-07:00

Today's the kind of day where it's hard to look and see the gifts. Warm bed, good dreams, annoying alarm clock. Sinus headache. Crazy kids cooped up after two days of rain. Late day at work. Hard hard workout. Messes everywhere. But still...I counted. Kept a piece of paper on my desk.

38. “I love you” whispered in my ear at the lunch table

39. A love note handed to me by a wild and wooly child in my class as I was scolding him for crawling under my desk. “What are you doing, Luke? Get out from under my desk and pay attention.” “I was just making you this note.”

40. An unexpected hug from a student

41. A quote on someone’s wall on Facebook

42. A daughter who isn’t afraid to ask the hard, and embarrassing questions

43. A dream that sticks with me all day

44. A long hot shower

45. A sweet email from my sister

46. Sharing birth stories with friends, and for the first time not wanting to do it again

47. A size large

48. Having dinner ready when we got home (thank you Daryl!)

One Thousand Gifts

2011-10-09T18:19:00.000-07:00

Have you heard of or read this book? I had seen mention of it on countless blogs, but really had not given much notice to it. I thought to myself, "I've done this before." You know, Oprah's gratitude journal. Which I kept for about as long as I do any journal--until the need for sleep eclipsed the need to write. I noticed friends posting #207, #334, and #78, followed by things that they were thankful for--some unique, some interesting, some touching, some banal. But it's never been something I really wanted to do. Until now.

What happened to change my mind? Friday did. (Warning: what I'm about to tell you will probably convince you that I am a complete and utter mental case.) As I was walking through the lunchroom, I thought about dinner the night before. How Sarah had made the entire dinner herself. How self-sufficient she was. And then. The morbid thought crept into my mind--if something happened to me, then she could take care of Daryl and the little ones. All of the sudden, what I later identified as a panic attack, began. I spent an agonizing 8 hours in the midst of a panic attack, trying to teach and pretend to all of the outward world that nothing was wrong. Eight hours of convincing myself that I was having a stroke, a heart attack, a brain tumor. That I was going to die and leave my kids motherless. (Wacko, right? I KNOW!) Finally, at the end of the day, I got the courage up to go and get my blood pressure taken by the school nurse. It was a little high. Not stroke high, but definitely higher than it should be on medication. I was crushed. Angry even. I'd lost 90 pounds since my first diagnosis. Started running 30 minutes a day. Cut out most bad foods. And still?

So I came home and did what most neurotic hypochondriacs do. I consulted Dr. Google. Typed in my symptoms and watched as time after time, no matter how I typed them in, the first five results were anxiety related. Sigh. Why? Why now? Why still? Why couldn't I get control of this?

Dejected, disappointed, and ashamed, I lay on the couch and surfed the web. And everywhere I clicked, it seemed as if mention of this book appeared. So I went to the website and spent two hours reading. Read the first chapter online, then found excerpts from the other chapters here and there. And there it was in front of me--me.

How often am I too consumed in the "grubbiness" and chaos of my everyday life to stop and appreciate all of the amazing gifts that God has given me. How often do I tell God, "It's not good enough." "No, God." "Not Your way, but mine?" How long had I lived a life full of frustration and fear because of my desire to be more, have more, be in control? And all the time, God had been giving me exactly what I needed at that very moment. The hard times, the good times, and yes, even the messy times.

So it is, with a humble heart and great transparency that I begin my list, my one thousand gifts, and share it with you. And hopefully, through this journey, I will learn to live fully in the chaos instead of wishing it different, and wake up to see all the ways that God shows me His amazing love.

1. Daryl

2. Hannah

3. Sarah

4. Madeline

5. Josh

6. Charlotte

7. Little girl who never stops talking, revealing all that is in her heart and head

8. Being able to run. I've wanted to be a runner all of my life, but have always been too fat, too lazy, or too out of shape (and usually all at the same time)

9. Becoming healthy

10. This panic disorder, that hides at times, and then emerges when I need to remember that it is all HIS doing

11. Josh being home

12. A phone call with my mom

13. A reunion with an old friend

14. Having Daryl home on a Saturday

15. A Saturday with nothing to do out of the house

16. A good night’s sleep

17. Hannah’s unabashed, unembarrassed love of the Lord and her unwavering belief in His goodness

18. Not being “obese” any more

19. 90 day supplies of my meds so I don’t have to worry about getting more during this rough financial time

20. Sarah working so hard to do well on her Socratic seminar

21. The confidence of Sarah and Josh

22. Time to do laundry

23. Marriage to my best friend

24. A laptop

25. Josh being at Toccoa Falls, and thriving

26. Daryl’s letter to Michael—a chance for me to see into his heart and his head, a chance I so rarely get

27. Daryl’s work—I miss him. I wish he was home. But it gives us the extra money that we so desperately need.

28. Charlotte’s head on my shoulder after nap time

29. A message at church so timely

30. Mrs. Conkle’s cookies—and the willpower to eat just one

31. The sound of Josh playing guitar in his room

32. All of my family home at the same time

33. The girls doing children’s church-that they are willing, and that they are spiritually and emotionally mature enough to work together to share the Word

34. Sarah singing in church

35. An unexpected break from AWANA’s

36. Clean, folded laundry

37. Finding a new way to cook fish every Sunday, so that everyone will like it and want to eat it. I'm finding I like to cook, and that something I make can actually taste good!

Homecoming Week 2011

2011-10-08T09:54:00.000-07:00

Can I get an "Amen" and a "Praise the Lord?" Because ELCA homecoming week is OVER!!! For those of you who are not familiar with the week, it's a week where the children big and small dress in a different theme every day, and the teachers try to teach while said kids are just plain whacko. Take the kid out of the uniform and instant chaos ensues. It's been a week--at school where it was not only homecoming week but end of the grading period as well, and at home, where we were scrambling to find clothes and create costumes.

Day 1- Super Hero Day

(by far my most prepared day)

Note the cute super hero cape I made for Hannah out of an old t-shirt

Supergirl, Harry Potter (who I say is NOT a superhero, but I was outvoted), and a Teenage Ninja Mutant Turtle minus the mask which she ruined one minute before walking out the door.

Day 2 - Team Day

Easy for the big girls. But for Hannah, the only team t-shirt she had was long sleeved, and since it is still mid 80's here, that wasn't an option. So she wore one of the big girls' shirts and we tied it in the back.

She doesn't look too thrilled above because just moments before, she looked like this. Ah yes,....the early morning right before school meltdown. Gotta love it.

Day 3 - Western Day (Which was originally Cowboys and Indians Day, but that was deemed offensive and politically incorrect, so at the last minute I was informed that Indian costumes were taboo. So I was forced to find a cowboy outfit for Hannah without spending any money. And that morning, we had lost her only pair of jeans that fit and she refused to wear the bandana that pulled the whole outfit together, and I was frazzled and sweating because I had on boots and a long sleeved shirt and like I said, it's still hot and what can I say? I'm a sweater--as in, someone who sweats buckets, not woolen piece of clothing. So no pictures then. But that afternoon, it was the pre-homecoming festivities.

Maddy worked (yes...for money!) at Sno-Biz

Sarah played in the powder puff game

And Hannah and her new friend Frankie participated in the long standing ELCA tradition of jumping down the bleachers and playing on "the hill."

She also somehow sweet talked Frankie's mom into buying her a sno-biz "shaved ice experience."

Day 4- Friday- Blue and Gold Day

My sweet class...who were still sweet but oh my goodness wild and wooly

After school, Daryl brought Charlotte to the school so we could eat together.

"Free" food from the Varsity. (the quotation marks are around free, because you only got a free ticket for your meal if you donated $10 out of every paycheck to the ELCA fund--so really, it's a $120 free dinner from the Varsity)

Hannah and Charlotte had fun playing Duck Duck Goose

Hannah, Charlotte, Kristen, Gracie, and Julia Rose

Three of the "Fab Five"--Sarah, Natalie, and Ellie

Sweet Maggie, one of my homecoming representatives

And Cole--her escort, also from my room

We won, the kids had fun, and Josh came home as an official "ELCA alum"-so all was good.

Looking forward to a normal dressing, somewhat calmer, less chaotic week!

Can I request a do-over?

2011-09-27T18:25:00.000-07:00

Because really....really really...I need one. It's been a day, in what is shaping up to be quite a week. And it's only Tuesday. Monday didn't start too bad. And it was pretty good, actually. Until 8:15am. When sweet little Maggie, who had just held my daughter, Hannah's, hand and walked her to class, came up to my desk and said, "Mrs. Stone, I don't feel (insert puking noise here)." And yeah, pretty much didn't get any better. Complete with fighting kids, peeing dogs, and burning dinner in the crock pot. (I mean, who does that?)

Today, though. Today was supposed to be better. Done with Monday. One day til "hump day." It had to get better. It was supposed to get better. Really it was.

Until 4:30, when I awoke from a nightmare in which I had used my magical powers to turn Hannah into this little embryonic three inch tall creature because she wouldn't stop talking to me, and then when I tried to change her back, she started shrinking. A psychologist would have a field day with that one, I'm sure.

Then, on my way out of the house, breakfast in hand, I couldn't remember whether or not I had unplugged my curling iron. So I deftly jumped up the step to "run" back into the house, missing the step all together and falling on my wrist. Lovely broken blood vessel and "super yummy" egg white and fat free cheese breakfast burrito spilled all over the porch.

Then, my day in first grade. Except my day also included a food fight with ketchup dipped napkins, a squealing surge protector, a full blown temper tantrum complete with leg kicking and floor laying.

So I ran. And felt somewhat better, once it was over. Until we were on the way home, and right at our street, I took the turn a little too sharply and blew out the tire on the SUV.

Not a good thing at the end of a very expensive month, three days before payday.

I made dinner--hamburgers (again-because...hey...three days before payday) I decided to be frugal and resourceful and go ahead and make our dinner for tomorrow too to take to church. I've not grilled too much, or really at all, but I had called Daryl and gotten directions. And was doing pretty well until flames started creeping out of the sides. Yep. Burned. Ten burgers. The dogs wouldn't even eat them (and these dogs eat each other's poop and used sanitary napkins).

Daryl was none too happy to have to come home from working two out of three of his jobs to a flatter than flat tire. And it probably didn't help any that when he opened the trunk to get to the spare, piles of books fell on top of him.

Oh well...I think *fingers crossed* that all may be forgiven now.

And tomorrow....it's gotta be better, right?

Planking

2011-09-24T17:10:00.000-07:00

Inspired by the first Office episode of the season, my girls now have a new obsession......

Competition Cheer Begins!

2011-09-24T17:06:00.000-07:00

Wow. (and note the enthusiasm) Two posts in a week. I do believe I may be coming out of my blog funk. I really think that I have reverse ADD. Instead of being distracted by everything, I get focused on one thing only and everything else falls by the wayside. First, it was blogging. Then for a while it was couponing. Lately, it's been getting in shape/losing weight/becoming more fit. Trying to fit a little bit of blogging and couponing in there too (and the kids, the hubs and the job, of course)!

Anywho....

Today was the girls' first competition of 2011. The Whitewater High Schoo Cheer Extrvaganza.

I was ready. The little girls were at home with Grandma and Grandpa. (THANK YOU!!!!)

I had my signs ready.

Here they are, "on deck."

Performing their first routine of the season.

Sarah is holding Maddy in her partner stunt on the left.

The bad thing about having both girls on the same team is that I can't watch both of them at the same time. I spent most of my time trying to locate either one of the two of them, and missing most everything else.

Sisters....

Maddy, Maghan, Tori, and McKenna. Hanging out after th performance. Hmmmmmmm....wonder what they are all looking at so intently.....

Could it be these guys?

First Place!

Fall Break 2011- Part 2

2011-09-17T16:41:00.000-07:00

Warning....picture overload!!!!!

On Tuesday, the boys went out with Captain Charles to go deep sea fishing.

Grandpa and Josh inspecting the bait.

Josh's shark--Captain Charles wouldn't let Josh hold it on his own.

Daryl's shark (guess Captain Charles didn't care whether the shark would bite him!)

In the end, they caught and fileted 192 fish. And...they brought them home. And WE brought all of them home. To this household who for the most part, doesn't like fish! (guess whose family will be eating fish once a week until we find a way everyone likes it?)

Sarah and Grandma fried it up (and made tacos too...just in case!)

While we were waiting for the fish to fry, Hannah ran around being cute :)

Charlotte played "Mary"

And Josh caught up on his reading

Family Fish Night

Then off to the beach for our traditional family pictures.

Oh, my heart....

and my love

I believe we took a picture like this ten years ago, to celebrate our new family.

Then I made sure to get a picture with each of my babies....not because I'm vain like that, but because I made a promise to myself that I would let people take my picture. I have always shied away from the cameras, and so there are so few pictures of me, and hardly any with my kids (only OF my kids). I want them to have pictures of themselves with me. And I want to be included in their memories.

Pretty Sarah with the "fluffy hair."

Josh looking handsome in his new hat

My sweet spunky Maddy

Sisters!

How lucky am I? Truly, truly blessed!

Fall Break 2011 - Part One

2011-09-16T14:07:00.000-07:00

Ten years ago, as a way of celebrating our coming together as a family, we packed up the three kids and headed for St. George Island, Florida. Daryl had visited there often as a child, and he wanted to share it with us. We loved it, and it became our regular vacation spot. Grandma and Grandpa have joined us every year, and while they never stay for the entire vacation, it wouldn't be the same without them!

Sarah and Josh headed out early Saturday morning in the Nissan. Daryl had to teach that morning at the college, so we couldn't leave til lunch time. Here we are at our first stop for gas, in our rental car--a very cool minivan. (Who'd a thunk it that I would say a minivan is cool? But it totally was!)

Our first stop was at Stripling's General Store and gas station. Have you ever "sausage" a place? Ha!

And where else could you get your picture taken with a giant pig?

We finally made it to the island, and Hannah quickly staked her claim to the top bunk. Unfortunately, I had visions of her trying to climb down in the middle of the night, so she slept on the mattress....on the floor. Maybe net year,Hannah!

The next morning, we had beakfast....

hung out with Grandpa on one of the porches...

and headed to the beach. We left Josh in the bed, and Sarah opted to go to the store with Grandma.

We played in the sand...

played with our cool sand toys...

and headed to the water!

Charlotte was terrified and wouldn't come near the water. Hannah was scared at first, but at least willing to try. By the end of the week, we had to drag her out!

As we were packing up to go home for lunch, we noticed a group of dolphins playing off shore. All of the sudden, they started jumping into the air. So thankful we had our camera to capture this moment!

More to come later....too many pictures to just make one post!

Happy Birthday(s) Charlotte! (Parts 2-3)

2011-08-27T14:31:00.000-07:00

Charlotte's birthday seemed to go on and on and on this year. From Saturday with my parents until Tuesday, on her real birthday, she celebrated. It got to the point that whenever she saw a gift of any kind anywhere, she would say, "Mine! It's my birthday!"

Who could blame her, though....with this sitting up on the counter....

"Please, Daddy? Please, Please, Please?"

(which sounds an awful lot like Deeeee Daddy, Deeee, Deeee, Deeee)

Hannah helped her open the first gift from Kay Kay (and claimed it as her own)

Charlotte opened the next for herself. She is such a little mother. Love.

Later on that day, Ms. Dana and Ms. Jan came over so Jan could see the house and give us an estimate for.....wait for it....CLEANING IT! Yes, that's right...we are going to have her come in and clean the house while we are at the beach. I can't tell you how excited I am, and how wonderful it will be to come home to a nice clean house!

Anyhow, Charlotte talked Dana into a story...and of course, Hannah had to get in on the action.

This picture just makes me giggle.

Then, finally, on Tuesday, it was Charlotte's bithday. Here's my 2 year old in one of her new dresses from Kay Kay.

And the presents Daddy bought and wrapped (in reindeer paper...where he found it, I don't know!

Opening presents!

and giving kisses

Then off to Dwarf House

Where the favorite things were the balloons

Char ate ice

and ice cream (her "cake")

And then home to play with the gifts. The sand and water table is the best gift. The girls just love it.

And where was Josh during all of this? Loving college, and doing things like hiking, studying, going to classes, and oh yeah, cliff diving. I stole this off his facebook page....miss this boy!

2011-08-20T17:12:00.000-07:00

Happy Birthday Charlotte!!!! (Part 1)

Let the birthday festivities begin! It's hard to believe that Charlotte is almost two. Where did the time go? In some ways, it feels like she's always been a part of our family, and in others, it seems like it was just yesterday!

Grandma and Grandpa came over to help her celebrate turning two.

She had seen the cupcakes all day long and begged and whined for one at every turn.

And while all of us were in the living room, she helped herself to a bit of frosting!

Grandpa and Sarah played some Just Dance.

We ate some pizza. See allllll this yummy goodness???

Yeah, this was my dinner...good stuff. Ahhhhh the life of a weight watcher.

Then it was time for cake.

And presents!

Her new riding toy...

and her lego table

and here you have Charlotte demonstrating how to sit on your riding toy and play duplos, thereby guaranteeing that no one else would play with either. ('cause they're miiiiiiiinnnnnnneeeee!)

Other random pictures...

More to come on Tuesdsay...her real birthday!!!!

Off to College

2011-08-18T17:44:00.000-07:00

On Tuesday, we took Josh up to Toccoa Falls College to start his sophomore year.

We knew it was the right place for him, that Clayton State had been a mistake caused by our lack of faith.

Didn't make it any easier, though!

The morning of....before the girls went to school

(and I am just now realizing that we never finished painting...ach...embarrassing!)

An hour and a half later, we were there...

Forrest Hall, his dorm

Such a different experience moving him in than my experience moving in at Clemson

or even moving him into Clayton State

Relaxed. People there to help us. Uncrowded.

Praise music blaring from the stereo.

Scriptures on the wall.

Josh's Room

and his roommate, Christian

Maranda joined him...aren't they cute, dressed alike?!

After they disassembled one of th beds so they could make bunk beds

much more room for refrigerators, video gaming systems, and guitars

Josh, making fun of me because I wanted to take a picture of his ID

and his actual ID...

About to say good-bye...

So many emotions right now.

Sad for us, excited for him and his future, disbelief that I have a college age son,

lonesome for my boy, pride in all he has accomplished and the choices he's made.

(and disgust at this picture...when did my neck get so old? And I lose 35 pounds...and still a double chin? Not to mention my need for more...um...supportive undergarments. ARGH)

Our week in pictures

2011-08-14T17:58:00.000-07:00

OK, not really. If I had to post pictures of our week, you'd see a picture of the SUV, my classroom, a HUGE pile of laundry, and some fast food wrappers. It was just one of those weeks where Daryl worked a lot, I had meetings at school out the wazoo, and we seemed to be constantly on the go.

Sadly, I didn't see nearly as much of this as I would have liked.

Hannah had fun with the dogs, though!

Jumping for joy because it's FRIDAY!!!!

Spending some quality time with big brother. Love love love this picture.

And lots of tending to this.

2:37 am     "Mom, Maddy hurt her foot. We've sent a picture of it to Breonna's mom, because she's a nurse, to see if it needs stitches."
3:15 am     "Breonna's mom doesn't think it needs stitches. Looks like it's all on the surface. Yeah, she's OK."
4:30 am     "It's finally stopped bleeding." (Clue #1 that maybe we should have come and gotten her at 2:37)

Back to the doctor tomorrow.

Fun stuff...not!

Our Last Weekend Together...

2011-08-14T17:40:00.000-07:00

before Josh goes to college.

We wanted to do something fun, and we wanted to do something as a family before we take him to Toccoa Falls on Tuesday (and leave him...ach) When you have big kids and little kids, family fun is hard to come by, but we knew what we had to do. Our first "family" date ten years ago was to Stone Mountain, so we packed up the blanket, the cooler, and the diaper bag (oh how times have changed!) and headed out.

Josh, Sarah, and I climbed the mountain, while Daryl, Maddy and the little girls took the sky tram.

(You know you might be a redneck if....you take a picture of the picture--hey, it was $20!)

Once at the top, Maddy enjoyed the view

(yeah,...she's totally faking it...we had no quarters)

My heart....so full.

Some of us walked down to the edge to look over.

While Sarah kept Maddy company at the top.

Then we all rode the tram down the mountain, staked our spot on the lawn and waited...

and waited (and danced)

and waited.

We had a picnic (to which Hannah exclaimed, "This is the best day ever!")

and waited some more

Still waiting....but it's dark now...won't be long!

For those of you who aren't familiar with Stone Mountain, they show a laser show on this carving which is on the side of a mountain

It was hot and sweaty, but Hannah was right.

My entire family.

Together.

In the place where it all began.

The best day ever.

Forgiveness

2011-08-07T01:07:00.000-07:00

I have opened up this page of Blogger countless times in the last two weeks, and always stared at the blank page before me, unable and yes, unwilling, to put on "paper" what's going on in my head and in my heart. I've taken and downloaded pictures--silly pictures of the girls, a gruesome picture of Maddy's latest injury, and blurry pictures of the first day of school--but the words have escaped me.

I knew this day would come. No, not the day that I ran out of words, but the day that would render me speechless. The day that I have been dreading, fearing, praying would wait until I was ready. But as I keep constantly reminding myself, it's not about me.

Twelve years ago, it was. I was the one left with three small children, no money, a broken heart, and more shame and embarrassment than any one person should ever have to endure. I was the one who loved and shielded my children. I was the one who had to be strong, saved my tears for late at night when the kids wouldn't hear. I was the one who really wasn't so strong as everyone thought, and lay in bed, night after night shaking uncontrollably as I watched my life spiral out of control. And I was the one who returned to church one morning, desperate for some peace and meaning, desperate to find a way out of the black hole I was in, and found Jesus. And I was the one who, despite it all, forgave.

Or so I thought. I don't think so anymore. Oh I talked the good talk. Read the right books (and the right BOOK), prayed the "right" prayers, had what I thought was peace. But forgiveness was easy when he wasn't around. When he lived a new life hundreds of miles away. When our lives no longer intersected.

But now they do. Right now, my baby boy (who is no longer a baby, or a boy) is in Louisiana. And so is his biological father. In the same house. On purpose. I don't know what is going on or what they are saying. I don't know if what he is telling him is the truth. I don't know how Josh is feeling or what he is thinking. He has someone else, now, to be his sounding board, his comfort, his love, and I am so thankful she is with him. But it is absolutely tearing my heart in two.

Right now, the girls are upstairs sleeping, tired from a cheerleading sleepover and emotionally drained after learning that their biological father is somewhat back in their lives. He's been the big pink elephant in the middle of the room that we've danced around for so long, but no longer. He's real, he's here, and he's something we all have to deal with it.

And as we sat around that table and the girls cried, I cried, and Daryl cried, I realized that I really wasn't as over this as I thought. And as Daryl sat at the head of the table and reminded me that my ex is only a man, and a man that God loves, and admitted to praying for him to come to know Jesus, I realized that I had really not forgiven.

Saying I had forgiven was easy as long as I didn't have to deal with him. As long as I didn't have to see him. As long as he was far away from the children. But as the very real possibility of having to see him again looms in the uncertain future, I realize that I am far from where I thought I was. My head knows I should forgive. My head thought I had. My heart knows differently.

And I don't even know how to begin. I'm really not angry anymore. But I don't think I will ever come to a point that I can forget the past and see him as Jesus does. I don't think I will ever come to a point that I can hope for good things for him. I don't ever think I will come to a point where the thought of him coming back into our lives doesn't scare me. And right now I'm scared. Scared of what he can do to the hearts, the minds, the lives of the children. I've seen it before. I don't want to see it again. I'm not as strong as I once was. I can't do it again.

I'm not superwoman. Yes, we came through it. Yes, the children are amazing testimonies to how God can take something horrible and use it for good. Yes, I lived through what would have broken many. But I had nothing to do with it. It was only God's grace and God's gift of Daryl that saw us through. And I am still broken...so very very broken.

And it's not about me, but them, now. What am I saying? It's always been about them, but this time, it's totally about them. I know I need to put aside the fear, the loathing, the distrust, and do what is best for them, not what is easiest for me. I need to once and for all, forgive and help us all move on.

But again, I don't know how. I know I can't do it alone. I know I need Jesus to guide me through. I just pray that my head will get out of the way of what my heart needs to do, and let God work a miracle in me.

I know He can. I know He does. I pray He will.

Our week in review

2011-07-29T18:56:00.000-07:00

It started with the "chicken pops."

On Wednesday night, we broke out Just Dance 2--seriously the best $100 we ever spent. So so so much fun. I have a friend who got it and then has posted videos of herself on the internet. Obviously she is my braver, more coordinated friend with more rhythm.

It was a nice bit of fun in the middle of a very busy, very stressful week. And a nice way to spend an evening together before the loooongest day ever- Back to School Day at ELCA. It was meet the teacher, all school worship service, picnic on the grounds, ELCA sports preview--and all of this was preceded by a mad dash to get everything ready in our rooms after three straight infuriating days of meetings.

Here's me being a geek and taking a picture of myself before meet the teacher, just to make sure. I can't tell you how many times I think I really look nice only to find out later that I had my sweater on inside out, or my slip was showing, or I had "embarrassingly high 80's hair.

One of the only down sides to having my children in the same school where I teach is that I don't get the chance to take Hannah to see her classroom or the first day of school. Maddy took her for me, and Sarah will take her on Monday.

Here she is with her teacher (and my weight watcher buddy) Mrs. Farr.

And with Ms. Sandi, Mrs. Farr's aide.

She wasn't too sure about going to kindergarten. She absolutely fell in love with school in K4, and wanted to go back to Ms. Colleen's class.

By today, she was a little more excited, and even wrote out a list of snacks she wants to take to school next week.

The uniforms are ready.

Sock and hairbows are ready and easily accessible. (Yes, be impressed with my organizational skills)

She was so excited (doesn't she look excited?) that she wrote a song about going to kindergarten.

Looking forward to one last weekend of freedom before the madness begins!

Monday Miscellany

2011-07-25T17:10:00.000-07:00

Saturday--before a much needed haircut. And yes, it was as bad as it looks. She's not a big fan of hair brushing or combing, so as we have found ourselves doing so often, we just did the bare minimum so she didn't look like a street orphan, except for Sundays.

And after.

Duckface.

Charlotte's first time-out. Doesn't she look penitent? (not) She is such a sweetheart, but lately, she has gotten great joy out of pulling Hannah's hair, kicking Hannah, hitting Hannah, and taking things from Hannah and running away with them. You would think that Hannah, with all of her attitude and feistiness (feistyness?), would stick up for herself. But no, she just sits there and takes it. I think we need to find a new location so that she doesn't enjoy it quite so much!

Not much else to report. Back to work for me today, so I have had my fill of sitting in meetings wishing I was in my classroom working on getting ready for those 20 first graders that will become "mine" for the school year. This time of year where I have a hard time sleeping--too much running through my head, so much to do and think about. This year has been particularly rough, as the insomnia started about a week ago and shows no sign retreating. Last night, I thought I had it licked, when who should climb in bed with us at 2:46? Hannah. And that's all she wrote.

Here's hoping for a good night's sleep...or actually sleep, period!

What Makes Me Happy Wednesday

2011-07-20T17:23:00.000-07:00

How better to jump back into blogging that with a giant pair of red satin panties, huh? For the last two weeks, I've had to deal with too many things that I would have just rather not have. It's in my nature to run, and run fast, from conflict and pain. But that's not really been an option, so I've had to put on my big girl panties and just deal. Tears, fears, and little sleep do not a good blogger make.

But, since I've felt all doom and gloom for the last couple of weeks, I thought a post focusing instead on my blessings was in order (plus there wasn't another way to tie in all these pictures). So it's Wednesday, and now to what makes me happy....

1. Maddy's finally home! OK, so she is not home in this picture, but all of the pictures that I have taken of her lately have been blurry (did I mention I still haven't been to the eye doctor?) Maddy's been a traveling girl this summer, going here and there and to the beach and to the beach again. But finally, she is home for good!

2. Charlotte and her impersonation from the movie, Parenthood. (If you are too young to know what I am talking about, there are two siblings. The sister drills her toddler with flashcards and classical music. The brother? His son goes around with a box on his head, bumping into walls.) How proud are we?

3. Sisters who take care of each other. We got home from the lake and Charlotte promptly got strep throat. She felt a little puny for a while, but Hannah got her all set up in her bed and let her "rest," which in Hannah-speak means, "lie in my bed and let me pile stuffed animals on top of you."

The next day she was feeling a little better, so Hannah thought she was ready for a step up, the rubbermaid drawer bed.

4. Vacation Bible School. Our church did Pandamania this year, and this was Hannah's first year as a participant. Here she is before VBS--hair done, shirt on, not quite sure if she wants to go.

And after. She LOVED it.

So proud of my big girls, who were helpers for the little kids.

Hannah especially liked the Praise and Worship time of the night. For a week after it was over, she led us in singing

jumping for joy for Jesus,

praising,

and prayer.

5. New bikes. Sarah has been saving all summer for a new bicycle, and now that summer is essentially over, she had enough money to buy it. I hadn't been on a bike in close to 25 years, but I did take a spin around the neighborhood. Oh how times have changed. I remember riding my bike, streamers flying, feet on the handlebars, wind through my braids, loving the feeling of "flying." This time? The whole time I was thinking, "It's a long way down if I fall. I would really hurt myself." Sigh...I'm old!

6. Toy catalogs. I don't particularly like them as much as I love watching the little girls with them. Hannah of course, wants everything. Charlotte, her little mimic, walks around showing everyone who will listen that there are babies in her book. Love love love her.

7. That man in the picture above. He is the voice of reason (most of the time) and my rock. Plus he's the hardest working man I know. This week, he is working at the school where he teaches in the morning, teaching a math camp at the college in the afternoon, rushing home to change and do electrical work in the evening, and then teaching a class at the college at night. And he does it all for us. Oh how I am blessed.

8. I got to get back in my classroom today. I've loved being home for the summer and being able to spend so much time with the kids, but I am a school geek at heart. Something about setting up a brand new classroom and the hope of a new year to come that is exciting and soothing at the same time.

9. Compliments! I've been at this weight loss thing for what seems like forever now, and today I got my first real compliment, from a former parent, who told me, "You're half of you!" Of course, it was followed by, "You always do this. You lose so much weight and then get pregnant. Is it that time again?"
Um...........NNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO thank you. :)

I hope you have lots to make you happy this Wednesday!

4th of July at the Lake

2011-07-05T12:37:00.000-07:00

We're at the lake visiting my parents on our summer vacation. At the moment, my great sleeper, Charlotte, is downstairs screaming hysterically because she doesn't want to take a nap. She's done a great job for the last three days napping and sleeping here, but right before she went down, Hannah had a screaming tantrum about not wanting to go shopping with the girls, but still wanting a toy. She kept coming in to the bedroom to beg me to change my mind about the whole thing, and then Sarah came in after her, and that was all she wrote for Char. Yeah...fun day. So, while I am trying to refrain from going to get her, I thought I'd blog about much happier times at the lake.

Summer at the lake means breakfast at the "bar." Oh how these girls love this.

It means swimming in the pool. They have two different pools in their development, one with a water slide, and I hope before this trip is over to get a picture of Hannah actually going down the water slide.

But for now...Hannah and Maddy...friends for now.

Four words: stay on Weight Watchers! Ugh. Sad part? I just hit 25 pounds gone and I still look like this!

Hannah shows us she remembers how to swim!

Sitting with Daddy during adult swim. When it comes to the sun, my husband and I are polar opposites. He slathered himself to go and sit in the shade. SPF4 for me!

Maddy gets creative with the dominoes.

We went to se fireworks at the Ritz by boat on the 3rd instead of the 4th. Last year was Hannah's first time she actually watched fireworks instead of burying her head in Daryl's shoulder. Since Charlotte doesn't have a lot of fears, we thought we would try it this year.

Getting ready...

and getting there.

Once we got there, of course, the camera battery died, so I haven't any pictures of the fireworks or the kids watching them. Hannah loved them, but kept her hands over her ears. To be as loud as she is, she sure does hate loud noises. Charlotte, on the other hand, stared with wonder at the first five or so and then spent the rest of the show like this.

Josh cacme yesterday morning, so we had some fun as a family...

swimming in the lake

and setting off fireworks and playing with sparklers.

Mission accomplished. Crying has subsided, for now. Charlotte - 2,485; Mommy - 1.

Top Ten Tuesday

2011-06-28T18:15:00.000-07:00

Top Ten Things I've Heard From My Kids This Week

1. "Mom...Mom....Mom...Your butt is on my foot." About once a week, Hannah climbs in our bed in the middle of the night after a. having a bad dream b. wetting the bed or c. deciding she missed us. Now, she is 5, and fairly small, so you would think she would just wedge herself between us and go right to sleep. And...you would be wrong. She takes up most of my side of the bed, so I surrender my pillow and give her my side of thebed altogether, grab a towel from the eternal unfolded laundry pile at the end of our bed, make a pillow out of it and sleep with my head at the end of the bed, my legs strategically placed between her and Daryl. Guess my strategy was a bit off, huh?

2. "I got sand in my phone and I really really need a new one!" Frantic phone call from Maddy from St. Simon's Island last Sunday morning. And I mean frantic. As in, crying, woe is me, what am I going to do, I can't text my friends frantic. (Why do you need to text your friends when you are at the beach with your friends?) I calmly told her what to do, suggested taking everything out and blowing on it, turning it off and then on again, while she insisted that we had to go and get her a new phone as soon as she got home. How long had it not worked? That's right. A whopping 20 minutes. Twenty minutes without text capability and she was panic stricken. By the way...you can take her off the prayer list. It worked five minutes later.

3. "Mom, does this thermometer work? I just puked my brains out." This from Josh, at what seemed to be the middle of the night (but which was probably about 11:30). You would think the child would learn from the last time he was puking his brains out--when he was in 5th grade and he came to tell me that he was sick. About seven times. And each of these seven times, I told him to go back to bed and he'd be fine. I found him the next morning laying next to the toilet, asleep. Not one of my finer mommy moments, for sure. This time, I did manage to at least think about getting up and checking on him at 2:30. I didn't get up, but I thought about it. (And he was fine, by the way...I did get up at 6:00 and wake him from a sound slumber to ask if he was OK) Life lesson? Momma is no good when she's asleep!

4. "I have to have these clothes. You know nothing about love!" And then picture Hannah stomping from the room with a Publix reusable shopping bag full of various, random pieces of clothing to take to Grandma's. In five days.

5. "owineoincjksdnavj guppies! a;lskdjojivbion e bubob!" Charlotte, in a conversation with me, holding the remote control in her hand. For the record, guppies=Bubble Guppies and bubob=Spongebob. She can't say much, but the girl knows her TV shows. Ahhh, yes, she is a Stone.

6. "Fefies!" Again, Charlotte, as we pull into the parking lot of Wendy's. I am choosing to believe that she is brilliant and not just so familiar with fast food restaurants that she can recognize the signs already.

7. "But I just can't help it! They're so good! Sorta warm and salty!" I won't gross you out with the particulars of this one, but let's just say that my daughter has a serious nose picking problem.

8. "Somone was talking about something that happened in 2000, and I mean, that was over ten years ago. I feel so old." Sarah, age 16. In 2000, she was what? 6? Just you wait until you are telling your children about your childhood and you find that most of your childhood memories involve items that are obsolete. Record player anyone? Typewriter? Atari? A TV you had to get up and change the channel?

9. "So do you worship doves?" I'm tutoring at our church and one of my former first graders asked me this question after noticing pictures of doves on some banners in the hallway. I really made an impression on him during Bible time, huh?

10. "It's hard to keep a secret, so I won't tell you. But do I have to clean with Sarah tomorrow?" Think they're planning something for our anniversary tomorrow?

Super Swimmer!

2011-06-27T18:15:00.000-07:00

Last week, Hannah had her very first swim lessons. Every day, for a week, we went to my friend Valerie's house and met with Ms. Peggy for her swim lessons. Then on Friday, she had a show off session to show everyone what she had learned.

Here's Hannah on her way to Macey's with her too cool "Minute to Win It" toy from her Wendy's kid's meal. I especially like the way it coordinates so well with her suit.

Blowing bubbles.

Jumping in the deep end. I really thought I would never see her do this. The first time she had to jump in (in the shallow end where she could touch) she stood there for five minutes saying "But I don't waaaaannnt to." To get the full effect, you must say that in your best whiney voice.

swimming!

Floating--her arms are out like that because if she didn't, she had a death grip on Ms. Peggy.

Charlotte sat around being cute...

and cuddling with Daddy.

After they were done showing off, Ms. Peggy had a surprise for them.

Swimming was such a big hit that Daryl decided that we needed a pool in our backyard. But until he gets to that part of "the list," we made do with this.

Now we're ready to go back to Aunt Patricia's to swim, and definitely ready for Grandma's next week!

(Not) Wordless Wednesday

2011-06-22T19:38:00.000-07:00

I was going to have this be my Wordless Wednesday...but then realized that I could not just post this and NOT comment. In my relentless pursuit of cheap groceries, I went to our new neighborhood grocery store. They carried a few amazingly priced national brands, many many extremely cheap off brands, and then there was this....

They call them Chicken Paws, like they are supposed to be all cute and cuddly.

These? Definitely not.

In fact...I took this picture a few weeks ago and it has haunted me since. Those things are HUGE and disgusting, and I just may have thrown up a little when I saw them. I could not even bring myself to go into the store again, even though they sell milk for 50 cents cheaper than Kroger.

Someone out there must know why someone would buy chicken feet.

Someone out there might even....gasp, gag...eat them.

Enlighten me please!

Monday randomness

2011-06-20T18:12:00.000-07:00

I really have to start blogging more--I end up with lots of pictures and no cohesive theme to pull them all together. So what you get is a bunch of unrelated stuff. I do, at least once daily and usually more than once, write a blog post in my head. It is witty and articulate, well written and tied together nicely. However, it is usually when I am sitting in traffic, cleaning up a mess, unloading the car, or falling into bed exhausted, and therefore have no computer with me, nor the wherewithall to write it. Hopefully, my blog writing mojo will return soon. Anyways...onto the stuff.

Praise the Lord!!! Maddy and Sarah are home! After a week in Daytona at church camp, they returned tired and tan, and I think even happy to see their little sisters.

We got the call..."Mom, we're about 45 minutes away." So we hopped in the car and drove through rush hour traffic to get there. So we could wait.

The bus is here!

Reunited....(sing it with me)

and it feels so good!

After dinner at Steak and Shake (our children, for some reason, always ask to go to Steak and Shake after they return from a trip), and a good night's sleep, and a frantic search for her wallet, Maddy departed again for St. Simon's Island with some friends. She is having a great time, despite one twenty minute phone crisis, but missed my birthday and Father's Day on Sunday.

We honored the amazing fathers that my dad and Daryl are and me turning...gasp...44 with my parents.

Daryl, in all of his wonderfulness, got me these....plus the possibility of turning these into a Nook Color. And even though it is just a possibility (depending on how pricey our car repairs are) I am over the moon at this possibility!

Daryl's Father's Day gift was not nearly as exciting, but super cute. I got him a picture frame with a verse of scripture on it with a picture of the kids in it. And then, I had to complete our set of "Daddy" photos with Charlotte. (For the full effect, picture them side by side--I am too technologically inept to figure this out myself!)

After all the excitement of our celebrations, Hannah got the opportunity to take swimming lessons this week with a friend from school. I knew this was something that she needed to do, since my parents live on the lake and we all love the water. Last summer, she had a scary experience while at my parents' pool, so I was a little worried how she'd do. She was a little worried about it too, and several times declared that she was NOT going to learn to swim unless she could bring her swim ring.

Neither of us should have worried. After a bit of hesitation at the beginning, a skinned knee and elbow running to the water, and only one brief episode of tears (during which my heart broke in a million little pieces and I had to force myself to stay in my seat and not go scoop her up in my arms), she had a blast!

So so proud of my girl!

Thankful Thursday....The Hormonal Edition

2011-06-16T18:55:00.000-07:00

What a week. Long. Hot. Sweaty. Exhausting. Hormonal. Need I say more? But despite the fact that I'm tired, crabby, and retaining Lake Erie, I do have so very much to be thankful for.

1. My wrinkles. While I was leaning over helping a student decode a word during tutoring this morning, said student looked up at me meaningfully. I thought, "She's got it! She's finally got it!" Until she spoke. And she said, "Why do your eyes look so crunchy today?" Crunchy? Really? (and she really didn't get it...for the 54th time?) I am thankful for these crunchy eyes because they mean I have spent summers enjoying the outdoors, and I have laughed. I have had so much fun that I've forgotten to take off my make up as I tumbled into bed. I've let little girls play make over with me and then gone in public.

2. Tutoring. I will be totally honest here. The thought of tutoring does not make me dance with joy. I have to get up early (setting the alarm clock in the summer is so not fair, I tell you), leave my kids, and go try and teach the kids who have struggled all year. This year, it is 7 boys and 2 girls. Seven wiggly, giggly, rather be playing outside or swimming boys. BUT...tutoring is a very high paid job for the time you have to put into it, and that money has come in so handy this summer already. Every year, I say I'm not going to do it...and every year I'm glad I did. I get to know some of my future students, and have a nice long goodbye with my students from last year.

3. Sarah and Maddy. My girls are in Daytona this week and oh do I miss them. I hadn't realized how much they've grown from little girls into young ladies/friends. I also hadn't realized how much I had come to rely on them to help with the little girls. All week, as I've tutored, poor Hannah has had to watch movies on my laptop/play Barbie/color/eat snacks behind a makeshift room divider because I had no choice but to take her with me. She's been good as gold, and I am so proud of her. But it will be nice to tutor next week without Barbie Swan Lake playing in the background!

4. Chick Fil A. If you are so unfortunate as to have never eaten at a Chick Fil A, I am truly sorry. Not only does Chick Fil A make the best chicken biscuits (of which I eat exactly once a week, after my Saturday weigh in), but they also serve Caffeine Free Diet Coke with the best crushed ice.(cue angels singing) They also have a varied menu, so that I can eat without blowing my points allowance for the week. Tonight, in celebration of Daryl's birthday, we took the little girls out to eat at Chick Fil A.

Look at my big girls not sitting in high chairs or booster seats.

And Charlotte, so eager to be a "big girl." She would take a waffle fry, tear it into pieces, dip it in ketchup, and then put it on her fork to put in her mouth. So cute!

5. My incredible, wonderful, husband, Daryl. It's his birthday today, and I couldn't be more thankful for another year with him. Not only does he make me laugh every single day, but he's an amazing father too. I mean, who else would humor their five year old and hang the "pinata" that she had made out of a trash bag from the ceiling fan?

"You might be a redneck if...."

And my creative little girl...wherever did she get the trash bag? Oh, by dumping the kitchen trash into the computer trash can, of course. Oh how I love her creativity, but boy can the girl make a mess!

6. Mother in laws that are willing to share their recipes. In the past, I have tried cooking for Daryl on his birthday. I tried banana pudding and peach cobbler, both favorites of his. Emphasis on the word tried. I thought they were ok, but seeing as neither of them is something I would choose to eat, I really didn't know. Until.....they sat in the refrigerator and grew mold. Yeah...not so much OK. So this time, I asked Nanny for her pound cake recipe so I could make strawberry shortcake. I made it last night, and despite my lack of mixing bowls, a good mixer, a loaf pan, and one of those rubber spatula thingys that you scrape the sides of the bowl with, I think it turned out OK.

Daryl actually said, "You did a good job with it." which is as much of a compliment I ever get from him, cooking wise. Only time will tell, though, if it grows mold!

7. The alarm clock. Every day this week, I've awoken to the distinctly annoying sound of the alarm clock. Which for me, when I really think about it, can be a good thing. A sleeper I'm not, and if I have to be roused from slumber by loud, staticy beeps, then it must mean that I'm sleeping.

8. Hair. I am the only person I know who has hormonal hair. Not only do I get to enjoy all of the other perks of being a woman once a month, but during this time, my hair refuses to curl, wave, poof, or anything other than lay flat against my head. It is during this week each month that I see the advantage of old lady hair. It's short. It's permed. Someone else washes it, sets it, and styles it once a week and it stays.

Speaking of hair......can you tell how much she likes it?

9. Our mailbox. Look....it stands!

A minor miracle, considering that I backed straight into it while backing out this morning. In front of my husband. Who is always dissing my driving skills. In my defense, we have four cars. Depending on when everyone gets home each day, I sometimes have another car parked behind me. Now Daryl and Josh have no problem maneuvering their way out of the driveway and drive through the yard to get out (again...you might be a redneck if...) Me? Can't do it. But still I try, thinking I am saving time by not having to get out, move the other car out of the driveway, back my car out, pull the other car in , run in to put the keys on the counter. And I have to do it anyways. Every single time.

10. 22 pounds gone. So thankful for this, because it appears that I am stuck. I have been the exact same weight for 11 days, except for yesterday morning, when I thought I had broken the plateau and lost 2 pounds, only to climb on the scale to see it wasn't so. Doesn't matter what I do. Eat a little? the same Eat a lot? the same Eat exactly the number of points I am allowed? the same. This is the same weight I got stuck at last September when I threw up my hands and went into a six month period of eating debauchery that lead to a 22 pound weight gain. Part of me wants to just quit, but the other, rational part of me knows that it will not do any good to do so. Plus, as Daryl pointed out, I am "financially invested." Pass the laughing cow cheese and carrot sticks please. sigh.

My Saturday--two highs and the lowest of low

2011-06-11T18:30:00.000-07:00

Saturday morning came bright and early, as it has for the last 10 weeks since I started going to Weight Watchers meetings. I know in my head why I chose the 8:00 am Saturday meeting--it was a time where I knew no one else in my house would be away and could watch the little girls, it would give me a weigh in time before I had the chance to eat or retain water, and I knew I would never make it to the 6:45 am meeting. I knew I had gone over my points a few days. I knew that the pizza had proved to be too much of a temptation last night. So I wasn't real sure what to expect at the scale. But YES...3 pounds gone, for a total of 22 pounds in all!

From there, I had some time to kill, so I moved on to shopping. Not just any shopping, mind you, but bargain hunting/coupon using shopping. I only had time to go to one store, but this set me back a whopping $0.74! Not too shabby for a beginner, I think.

The high was short lived, though, as I pulled out of the parking lot, heard a screech and a pop, and blew my tire out. I pulled into the parking lot and attempted to jack up the car, in a dress, in near 95 degree heat while three men inside the Firehouse Subs and one man inside the cleaners watched. My sweet boy came to my rescue and changed my tire so I could get where I needed to be.

I didn't want to have to be going there. I knew it would be one of the saddest days things I've ever experienced. But I also knew that I had to. I needed to.

Three days ago, a friend of mine lost her 5 year old daughter. She was running through the house and bumped into a wall, breaking her arm. Trying to calm her at the urgent care center, the doctors gave her some morphine which sent her into cardiac arrest. Her mother watched as the paramedics tried to bring her back, but in the end, her sweet girl had gone to be with Jesus.

I know that she is in Heaven now. That the life and laughter that filled her here on earth fills her in eternity. Oh but how my heart hurts for her mother, her father, and her sister, who was in my first grade class last year. A feeling of helplessness, for what can you say, what can you do that will make any difference? My mama heart is just broken for her, and I wonder how I would even go on. If I could even go on. I've been through some rough stuff in my life, but nothing compared to how they are feeling right now.

As I write this, my little girls-up much too late-are dancing and twirling and laughing. My big girls are downstairs together in our bed, watching TV, excited about going to camp on Monday. My husband is watching baseball, my boy is on his way home from work, and all is right with my world. Sure, it's messy. It's loud. It's chaotic. But it's complete. And they will never be complete again. A Kensley shaped hole in their heart and in their lives for as long as they live.

It's been a long time since I've had a grief headache--a headache from crying so much. I think the last time was when I went through my divorce. Both then, and now, my life and my priorities were put so sharply in perspective. In both instances, I questioned why. On the other side of my divorce, I can see clearly how God worked through everything that happened for my good, just as people told me I would. I can't imagine how or why God would allow this to happen. And maybe I'll never know. But I do know my God. And that He works everything for our good and His glory. That He is unchangeable, and just as He was there for me throughout my divorce, He will be there for her family. And until I understand, and even if I never do, I'll pray. For that's all I know how to do.

A Day in the Country

2011-06-11T17:42:00.000-07:00

When Daryl and I had been dating about two months, he told me, "My family wants to meet you. We're going to the country." Little did I know that I was heading down to meet the whole Stone clan--all 21 of them. And the country? I'd never been to the "country" before. But indeed, as we traveled farther and farther away from the interstate and anything resembling a store or restaurant that I had ever heard of, we were definitely in the country. Actually, it is Luthersville, GA, and Daryl's aunt, uncle, and two of his sisters and their kids live there, all on one road on connecting properties. In the ten years since that first trip to the country, we've been there many times for baby showers, wedding showers, and even a wedding. And this past Friday, we went down their just the seven of us, for some summer fun.

We got to the pond with the fishing poles, the tackle box, the worms, the crickets, and the chicken livers, and what interested Hannah and Charlotte the most?

The bathroom.

I would say we had been there all of ten minutes when Charlotte slipped and fell in the mud.

They all fished, while I chased Charlotte around, trying to make sure she didn't slip and fall again.

Josh caught the first fish...on his first cast.

(Doesn't he look handsome now that we can see his eyes?)

Hannah chased baby frogs...and caught several.

Daryl, Maddy, and Sarah all caught the same snapping turtle.

Hannah got bored and left her pole on the ground to chase frogs and caught a fish. Doesn't she look thrilled?

Finally, I gave up the fight and took the girls up to the house so we could swim.

We had a great time swimming and visiting with Aunt Patricia.

It was getting close to rush hour by the time we left, so we decided to take the back roads home instead of the interstate. We managed to get behind every slow driver and get stopped by every red light in Fayetteville, and Charlotte slept 12 minutes. Maybe. She grumped a bit, but not as much as Josh who was in the back seat and ready to be home.

I know it's politically uncorrect to say that I love her little sunburned cheeks, but I do. I did put sunscreen on her--once at the pond and twice at the pool!

Top Ten Tuesday

2011-06-07T17:39:00.000-07:00

Just a few (or ten) random thoughts about our summer so far.

1. I have the most wonderful daughters! (and while I realize I do tend to overuse the exclamation point, this does indeed deserve one...a few actually) I woke up Mondy to go start tutoring, and looked around my house in disgust. The week with the stomach flu and the resulting uberfussy toddler combined with my weariness and obsession with getting the weekly coupons clipped and sorted left our house a total wreck. I was horrified, disgusted, and glad to get out of the mess for the day. When I left, the girls were still asleep. When I returned, the house was clean! What an amazing blesssing! And no, I don't have before and after pictures because I do not wish for DFACS to come and take my children away.

2.Hannah has developed a very loud voice this summer. It seems as if she must say everything, and I do mean everything like she is yelling it. I don't know if it is a result of trying to be heard around here or her ears are plugged up, or a week out of preschool and she has lost the ability to use her inside voice, but wow, is she loud.

3. Hannah has developed an intersting fashion sense this summer. What is it that they say? A picture's worth a thousand words?

4. We have been playing a lot of Wii this summer. And Hannah and Charlotte have played a lot of fake Wii this summer. For those of you without the older kids/younger kids dynamic, this is when you give your younger kids "dead" controllers and let them believe they are actually playing...and winning.

5. We LOVE sidewalk chalk. Ever since I brought it home at the end of the school year from my classroom, Hannah has had to play "chalk" at least three times a day. And yes, she is sitting in the middle of the road, in her church dress. What can I say, I'll do anything to avoid making more laundry.

6. Fighting, fighting, fighting. Oh...the fighting. It's gonna be a looooooonnnnng summer. Maddy and Hannah fight, Sarah and Maddy fight, Charlotte and Hannah fight. Did I mention that Maddy and Hannah fight? Because they do. At least 15 times a day. No joke. Resulting in Hannah crying and running to me screaming and Maddy calling her a baby and remarking about us liking Hannah better (and can't she just punch her in he face?)

7. Screaming, screaming, screaming. Oh...the screaming. Remember this?

Every day, most of the day, this is what she looks like. She hears someone say the word "popsicle," and she runs to the freezer, throws herself against it and screams. You tell her it's time to put away the crayons, and she immediately starts to scream. She wakes us, she's cranky. She's hungry, she's cranky. The terribe twos have hit with a vengeance. I actually heard Daryl say to her afterthe aforementioned popsicle incident, "Charlotte, just because it works, doesn't mean you have to scream!" He's right...it works. We need to fix that.

8. She can still be very sweet. She's like the little girl with the curl...(and I very obviously haven't been to the eye doctor yet)

9. I saw this book at Barnes and Noble when I was picking up Sarah's summer reading book, The Crucible.

It's a book of short stories, which is about all the time I have had for reading lately :(((<--big big sad face. Just the title--and the title of the first story captivated me. Liked some of the stories, loved others. Found something in every story to relate to. And, oh how I wish to have a day that I could eat whatever I wanted!

10. Speaking of eating...or not eating whatever I wanted...I have unofficially hit 20 pounds gone! Unofficial because I haven't reached it on the official weight watcher scale, just ours in the bathroom this morning!

2011-06-04T16:02:00.000-07:00

Top Five Reasons You Might Have a Slight Obsession with Coupons

1. Extreme Couponing Marathon Yes, a few weeks ago, there was a twelve hour marathon of TLC's show Extreme Couponing. I may or may not have watched the entire season, mouth agape and mind racing.

2.After a few words from your husband ("We could totally do that."--yes, sadly, that's all it took), you go out and buy a binder and baseball card collecting pages, and even a brand spankin' new pair of scissors. This makes you giddy.

3. In only a few hours, you have your coupon notebook set up and despite your ability to even remotely organize anything else in your house/classroom/life, it is meticulously organized and stays that way.

4. The opening of a new grocery store and their 10 for $10 prices make you giddy. And, when upon going to this store and finding turkey bacon on sale, and with your coupon, you only have to pay $.35 for it, you must buy three. You are truly excited about this and when you show your kids, they point out the obvious. "But we don't even eat bacon, Mom." and you hear these words come out of your mouth, "But I only paid 1/10 of the usual retail price! $.35 cents!"

5. After your weekly Weight Watchers meeting, you decide to take a few more moments for yourself and stop by a few places just to check out the sales, and to take advantage of your coupon stacking. You return home 4 hours later and your girls smile at each other, shake their heads, and say, "Mom, you're one of them." And you consider it a compliment.

Hannah's Special Day

2011-06-04T15:47:00.000-07:00

For once, it really was all about Hannah, as she had a special Mommy and Hannah day. Usually she exists in that world that most children do, the one in which the world does totally revolve around themselves. But on Friday, it really did. Charlotte got to go to Kay Kay's for her weekly visit, the girls had cheer camp, and Josh and Daryl were off working. Seeing as I was left with only Hannah, and Hannah had been having a bad case of jealousy when Charlotte was sick, I decided to make a day of it with her.

We came home from dropping off all the other girls, she took a bath and I took a shower, and we had some mother-daughter bonding time as we folded laundry. :) Then we went to "Walmark." Oh how I hate "Walmark." I can never find anything and there are always about 3 cashiers open (out of 27 lanes, mind you) and half the population of the greater Lake City area are in them. They also don't let me use my debit card because it doesn't have my name on it, which six years ago in the 7th month of my pregnancy with Hannah sent me into a hormonal tantrum(complete with throwing myself dramatically across the bed and sobbing) of which I obviously have not yet recovered. But we needed (wanted) food and dishes for Hannah's kitchen that they have been unable to play with for the last two years, and they were the cheapest (and I had a gift card).

Then we headed to I-Hop for lunch. I had another gift card, and only the best for my girl. There she enjoyed macaroni and cheese and "chewy" bacon, all while insisting to stare at the little girl across the aisle, saying, "I'm not staring, Mom. I'm looking at her because she likes me!"

As soon as we were done, she couldn't wait to get home to play kitchen. "And Mommy, you have to play with me because it's my day."

(I had all sorts of cute pictures of her serving her Daddy and her sister, but as I may have mentioned before, the auto focus on my camera is broken, and I guess I must be due for an optometrist appointment, because they were all blurry)

After she tired of "kitchen," we got her blanket and pillow, snuggled up on the couch with popcorn and cake, and watched her new Barbie movie, Swan Lake. She even had me take her shoes off for her ("because it is my day after all" no joke)

I was not allowed to even open my computer, but enjoyed watching Odette and Daniel and enjoyed a steady stream of comments and questions throughout the movie.

After dinner, when I made her take the dishes to the sink, she said under her breath, "Well, I guess it's not my day anymore."

Loving it....hating it

2011-06-02T17:28:00.000-07:00

I've been a stay at home mom for a week now. On one hand, I have loved it. I have loved being home with my little girls (my big girls and Josh have been gone all day). I have loved the hugs throughout today, exploring different things with them, watching them interact with each other, listening to them while they play. I have loved "books" before naptime, first thing in the morning snuggles, time to listen to stories, the opportunity to listen to Charlotte's ever burgeoning vocabulary. I have loved not having to get up at 5:45. Not having to find something cute and flattering and appropriate to wear, and find two of the same shoes to match it. Not having to put on make up or do my hair. Being able to cook dinner, surf the internet, do laundry, all without being rushed.

On the other hand. ARRRRRRGGGGGHHHHH! While I have had ample time to do laundry, I have also had an abundance of pee/poop/vomit covered clothing/blankets/pillows/sheets to wash. While I have loved watching them play, I have been amazed (yet not surprised) at the number of times Hannah can get out every single Barbie, and how quickly she is finished playing with them. Or, substitute Barbies with play doh, crayons, stuffed animals, or stickers. I have picked up the living room about eight times a day for the last four days, and somehow it seems to always be a mess. And while I have had time to do all the domestic chores that I have neglected since August 1 last year, I have had a sick toddler in my arms(or following me around crying/vomiting/whining) and not a lot has gotten done. We have not left the house in a week except to take/pick up the girls from cheer camp and that time has been spent fighting with each other and screaming that we're "stuck" in our carseat and gagging like we were going to throw up.

Don't get me wrong. I am so thankful for this time I have with my children, this time to be at home. What a blessing to have a job I love and 7 weeks every summer to stay home with my family. But at the same time, it only reinforces the notion that I have that I am not cut out to be a stay at home mom, that God gave me a calling to be a teacher for a reason. Maybe if I did it more often, I'd be better at it. Better organized, more patient, able to conquer laundry piles and cranky toddlers in a single bound. Maybe I'd enjoy the laundry, the play-doh mess on the floor again, organizing my household to run to perfection. I used to feel guilty that I didn't love it all the time. After almost 20 years of being a mom, though, I realize my own limitations, my own strengths and weaknesses, and that I can be a working mom and a good mom all at the same time.

To all you stay at home moms out there, my hat is off to you. You have the hardest job on the planet, by far, in my book...and you don't get to leave it all behind at 4:00. I'm hoping that the next 6 weeks will teach me how to do it better, appreciate the messes, and conquer my chronic disorganization. Suggestions, helpful hints welcome!

Ten Things To Smile About

2011-05-31T04:52:00.000-07:00

Who am I kidding? I'm never going to get it together this summer. You know what they say about the "best laid plans of mice and men?" I had a very productive Sunday and was geared up to knock it all out on Monday. Then I took the girls shopping and they bought Just Dance 2. So. much. fun. and, yes, just as embarrassing as you think it would be. I seriously have NO rhythm, and when I do get my arms going the right way, my feet...well, let's just say I can't move them at the same time. Then about the time that I got done entertaining my girls with my less than groovy dance skills, Charlotte woke up from her nap and started throwing up. Nothing like a bit of barf to get the summer rolling.

So instead of at work this morning, getting everything finished so I can close the door on that chapter, I am at home, exhausted from a sleepless night, praying the rest of them don't get it, and trying to figure out how to get the big girls to the dr. for their sports physicals so they can participate in cheer camp tomorrow.

So instead of reveling in my exhaustion fueled blah-ness (for lack of a better word), I'm linking up with Emmy from One Day At A Time.

TEN THINGS TO SMILE ABOUT

1. Hannah's imagination. I love to watch her play, especially with her Barbies. I get such an insight into her little mind, her beliefs about herself and others, and her moral compass. Here are just some of her Barbies getting ready to watch her new Barbie movie.

2. My big girls getting along...and actually bonding!

3. Pretty pictures of my girls.

4. Hitting 16.6 pounds gone and getting to "celebrate" with my WW buds.

5. Hannah and her friends.

6. Sweet baby cousins--Cole and Clare.

7. Hannah being a "big girl" and reading to the babies. Oh, how I love that they both love books!

8. My dad teaching Hannah how to fish.

9. My wonderful husband for getting up at 4:00 am this morning and letting me go to sleep for a couple of hours while he held, rocked, and held the bucket for a puking Charlotte. And bless his heart, he got her to sleep!

10. SUMMERTIME!

Gone, but hopefully not forgotten

2011-05-29T11:15:00.000-07:00

Because I'll be back...I promise! Just feeling a little overwhelmed right now and am giving myself until Friday to get my life in order so I can start enjoying summertime. I've got at least 15 loads of laundry (not kidding here, either), plus 5 baskets plus a sock basket to fold and put away. I've got a house to clean from top to bottom so we can maintain it over the summer. I've got a year's worth of papers to file, last year's writing samples to score and file and pass on, and two semesters of curriculum maps to complete. Thank you notes to write, coupons to file. A closet or 3 to clean out and a goodwill trip to make. And this is all after I pack up my room and move it all into a storage unit. Do you see why I might be just a little overwhelmed? It's like Hannah, who doesn't know where to start cleaning her room, and so she doesn't and the mess just grows and grows until she's a puddle on the floor, crying that her "legs hurt" and she can't possibly get it done all by herself. Except. (don'tcha hate those?) In Hannah's case, I sweep in and do it with her, and it gets done. Unfortunately, no one will sweep in here and do it for me. In fact, many little ones (and a few big ones) will probably sweep in and make it just a little bit harder.

When I do get my life together, I have lots of things to blog about...Hannah's last day of preschool (sniff), a trip to the lake to see the twins, and the top ten things I learned from being without power for 12 hours.

Until Friday......

When it's the last week of school....

2011-05-24T09:55:00.000-07:00

And you're a person who craves order and structure and routine (and kids who obey, or actually just listen), the last week of school is exhausting. It drains every ounce of energy, patience, and creative juice from your body. You want to be super teacher.

But you find yourself more of a referee (and...yeah right, but a girl can dream, can't she?)

You find yourself saying things like, "You are making me grumpy when I'm talking about Jesus!" and counting backwards from 10 entirely too much and resorting to putting a movie on the smartboard and playing movie theater.

You also find yourself doing a lot of this

and this...

and this....

(but because your specials are cancelled for the last week, picture 21 six year olds crowded around asking you silly questions and tattling)

All of your foolish ideas that you were going to spend the last week of school enjoying each other

quickly deteriorate as you realize on Monday at 8:03 that your children would much rather do this.

And by the time you get home, you have no energy left to do anything but sit at the dinner table wishing you weren't on a diet and having "my day was worse than your day" competitions with your husband.

Good news, though! Only 2 1/2 more days and then it is blissfully, thankfully, OVER. And while you still have to come to school for the one day of post planning they give you, an almost impossible task considering you have to file every single paper from the school year (I swore to myself I wasn't going to do that this year, but why break an almost 20 year streak?) and remove the entire contents of your classroom into a storage unit for 6 weeks, at least you are that much closer to that time that all teachers look forward to from about February on:

SUMMER VACATION!

2011-05-18T17:27:00.000-07:00

I'm sick and I'm tired, and quite honestly, I'm sick and tired of the daily grind that is the last two weeks of school. So I'm uninspired. And I haven't taken any cute pictures. So I'm joining in the Wednesday Hodgepodge with Joyce from This Side of the Pond.

1. What reveals more about a woman-her refrigerator or her purse?
There probably is a right answer to this, but I don't have it. If all women are anything like me, her purse and her refrigerator reveal the same thing. In my purse is my wallet, my Kroger plus card and my debit card floating conspicuously around (NOT in the wallet). I've got used tissues (not mine), a stray sucker or two (again, not mine), my weight watcher calculator and tracker, old receipts and expired coupons. Somewhere, under all that, are my keys. In my refrigerator are three half gallons of milk, two of them half full. A nice selection of food and then the diet variety of the same food. Three cartons of eggs, two of them expired. A pizza box from Sunday with exactly one small piece of supreme pizza that no one will ever eat. So both of these things ~~say~~ shout, "Here is a fat (but trying), unorganized, Kroger shopper!"

2. When was the last time you went to the zoo? Where? What's your favorite zoo animal?
How sad it is that I have no idea? I know we went when Hannah was two-ish (and I know this only because I remember what she was wearing and it is currently hanging in Charlotte's closet), but for some reason, I think we have gone since then too. We did go to the Aquarium in Chattanooga last September. My favorite animal? I like the otters.

3. What social issue fires you up?
Right now, immigration issues (this may be politically incorrect, but I can't read any of the signs in the Payless down the street and it ticks me off. We're in America, people!) and people spongeing off of the government. I pay my taxes like anyone else, and when I was suddenly left a single mother with three small children, I got a low paying preschool teacher job. And even though it wasn't enough to support us, it was too much to receive any assistance. I know this for a fact because I stood in the "welfare line" for three hours with three children, hanging my head in shame, in tears, only to be told I made too much money. (and btw, this was the same day I filed for bankruptcy and divorce...a banner day, I tell you) People who don't work because they choose not to, yet happily receive government assistance? Yeah...grrrr.

4. Are you a coupon clipper? If so, are you extreme?
Nope. Used to be, but not anymore. I find I can do just as well at Kroger with our Kroger card, generic brands, and the occasional sale. I don't have time to clip coupons, and when I do and I put them in that nifty little coupon sorter thingy, I always leave it at home. And while the idea of a stockpile secretly fascinates me, we have no more room for ANYTHING in this house, much less 48 tubes of toothpaste.

5. What is one of your favorite souvenirs brought back from your travels?
I bought a dress in Hawaii that I loved. My favorite color, a gorgeous print, and it reminded me of my honeymoon. Then I washed and dried it. And now it would fit Maddy.

6. Lemon meringue or key lime?
Neither. Both break the "if it is fruit it is not dessert" rule.

7. What is the most beautiful word you know in any language?
I know I should have some deep, meaningful answer to this. Love. Mercy. Grace. Jesus. But really? gli elletrodomestici Just say it once. I dare you. It's a beautiful Italian word. (and it means household appliance--how ironic)

8. Insert your own random thought here.
Please hand me the "Mother of the Year" award. Last week, I totally missed the middle school awards ceremony where Maddy got her A-B honor roll certificate. This week, determined to do better, I wrote the highschool awards ceremony time on my calendar. Calendars, however, only work when you look at them periodically. Yep. Sarah texted me from the ceremony to tell me it had started. I quickly left my classroom and got there in time to see Sarah receive the 10th grade English award. But...no camera. So...see that little speck on the right in this horribly taken picture? yep....that's my girl!

Tuesday Top Ten

2011-05-17T16:04:00.000-07:00

Top Ten Things I Would Blog About If I Had Time to Blog

1. Why I could never have a nanny. Or, in other words, our babysitter had surgery today and Josh's girlfriend is watching Charlotte every day. On one hand, we are very grateful to have Maranda, someone who loves Charlotte and who Charlotte loves, come to our rescue. On the other hand, she is coming into our home every day. Which means our usual (read: my usual) housekeeping skills had to be stepped up. And this time of year? Just too hard. On the plus side, I did get a good sweat going on mopping the floors until the water ran clear.

2. Speaking of sweat....I still hate to exercise. I really really really want to be one of those people who loves it. Really. But I don't. It makes me sweat buckets. It makes me super hungry. And I spend the whole time thinking about all of the other things I should or wished I was doing. Talking myself out of the mommy guilt.

3. Arnold Schwarzeneggar is scum. So is the lady who faked her own kidnapping by pretending to call from the trunk of a car. And the lady who smothered her baby so she could go out west to meet a man she met online. What is wrong with people?

4. Choices. I've made choices with what to do with my evenings lately. And what has it gotten me? Hours and hours of schoolwork that has to be completed and turned in by next Friday at noon. I've made choices with my footwear lately. Chosen cute over comfortable. Too high or too low. And what has it gotten me? A flare up of my plantar's fascitis and a month long regimen of anti-imflammatories.

I've finally chosen ME and my health over sleeping late(r) on Saturday mornings and doing housework/meeting the needs of my children after dinner. I've started going to Weight Watcher meetings and exercising regularly. And what has it gotten me? It hasn't gotten me anything, but it has taken something...12.2 pounds, baby!

5. "I can't believe you are going to leave me here! I want to go with you! My butt officially looks like a failure!" and other funny Hannah sayings.

6. Administrators that ask for your input and then ignore it, especially when their decisions don't affect anyone else but me. Enough said. Harumph.

7. Why having four dogs and no grass in your back yard is a bad idea. Why said four dogs think it is a must to get into any and all trash cans, even though they have just been fed. And the proof that when you lose one sense the others go into overdrive, or how our old blind cocker can find a dirty diaper or used sanitary napkin, even though she pees inside on the carpet because she thinks it is grass and routinely runs into walls.

8. Sisters.

9.love love love them.

10. I really don't have time to blog!

Blogger MIA

2011-05-14T04:04:00.000-07:00

Have you seen this blogger?

Height: 5'9
Weight: too much, but slowly and surely shrinking
Hair Color: Miss Clairol "Golden Brown" with roots visible
Eye Color: Dark brown and bloodshot with heavy bags
Distinguishing Characteistics: bags under eyes, water bottle in hand
If found, please return to home, school, church, car, with cold diet coke, preferably with crushed ice.

Friends, it has been at least three days since my last post. I can blame Blogger for part of it (and can I tell you that finding it was down was sort of a relief?), but the other part I can blame on just being, and excuse my southern colloquialism, "slap worn out." The end of the school year is fast approaching (9 1/2 days,...but who's counting?), and as usual at this time of year, everything else seems to kick it up a notch. The children at school are wild and wooly. The children at home and grumpy and fighting (plus none of them seem to be doing any of their chores...hmmmm). It's the end of the year banquet for that, end of the year dinner for this, end of year paperwork for that, end of year committee meeting for this. Practice here, party there, concert close to home, but party pick up duty across town. End of year paperwork due yesterday, and "if you've been keeping up all year, it shouldn't be difficult." IF. Painful parent conferences to have. New students to test. And while you're at it, get ready for your son's girlfriend to come into your home for 10 hours a day, every day, next week to watch Charlotte because the babysitter is having surgery. (clean like a madwoman). And while you are doing this, don't give in to the urges to eat mass quantities of ice cream/pizza/french fries/or any of the treats in the veritable treasure trove of carbohydrates that is our pantry snack shelf. Eat only lean proteins, whole wheats, and tons and tons of veggies. And love it. And do so with a happy heart even though, as predicted, your husband lost in 5 days almost as much as it has taken you a month of hard work to lose.

My body is weary, my brain is weary, and my spirit is oh so weary. I'm doing countless different things and none of them well...including sleep. The good news? 9 1/2 days and it will be summer vacation. Less than ten days to hold on to my sanity and my smile, and then I can have the whole summer (all seven weeks of it) to catch up. Catch up on sleep, catch up on exercise, catch up on quality time with my kids. Read lots of books. LOTS of books. Get back to blogging and reading blogs daily, because really, I love it.

Until then, I hope to be back here once every couple of days with a cute picture or two, random thoughts, and mindless ramblings.